Surely she didn't

But, oh yes she did.  Daughter not only missed dinner on Sunday, she didn't even call her dad.  There was -- wait for it -- a swim meet.

It is no secret that G and I are NOT rabid sports fans.  These sports for kids have gotten completely out of hand.  We really hate these events that take place on Sundays, but when they are on "holidays" like Mother's Day or Father's Day, we really find them absurd.

So that was the case yesterday.  It was the 'Pentathlon" event of summer league (I guess).  They spent the entire day at this thing - I am talking about from about 7 am to 9 pm.

She called at 8 yesterday saying they weren't gong to be in church.  I asked about dinner, and it was THEN she said she doubted it.  She has know this little fact for weeks.  Weeks!!!!!

We were going to celebrate Father's Day and SIL"s birthday.  Well - he wasn't here last night.  For a special celebration I decided I would make seafood lasagna.  With fresh seafood.  Not a cheap dish.  I plan and begin to execute the menu early, and I buy the ingredients before Saturday evening.  So I had planned for 12.  It was 7.

There was never another call for her father until 10:32 last night.  Our phone system is strange, so it rang once here, but several times on the caller end.  It went to voice mail.  She was calling - then.

So perhaps the feelings I dumped on you last week - I guess they weren't too far off.

To find a positive to end on - at least I got to give my total attention to the little grandkidlets.  They amaze me in that we don't really spend as much time with them, but you would think we saw them everyday.  There is no shyness in our relationships.  Interesting.

Other than the usual typos because I can't type, you may find some strange words in this.  I picked up my new glasses.  I can't see s*it.  I don't know if my eyes are acting up or if the glasses aren't what they should be!   At least they are guaranteed.  They may be going back.

What is wrong with me?

I am beginning to wonder if I might be slightly manic/depressive - if there is such a thing.

Right now I am obsessing about relationships.  I am feeling very ignored.  I KNOW that isn't really true - notice said "really" as if there is a doubt in my mind.   Then I begin worrying about the time I have left.  I know there aren't too many days out there for me.  I hate that.  I want to be around to see my grandchildren and for that matter even their grandchildren.

Crazy.  Absolutely crazy.  I think I am still very childlike in my view of life.  Deep down, I believe I am invincible.  This dying stuff - why that' s for other people.

When I really begin to accept that I am mortal, I pout.  Every time I think of dying, I think my family really ought to be spending time with me.  They'll be sorry when I am gone.  Then they won't have the opportunity.

Then I begin to think "I hope they WILL miss me rather than be glad I am gone."  And, without going into even more detail that will  make me look WORSE, I don't want to be like some of those who have gone on and I was relieved - even glad.

When Daughter first moved back here, we spent Saturdays together.  We would go out shopping.  That doesn't happen any longer, and I miss it.  It was a grand time being together talking, sharing.  Now with three kids who are involved in swimming (all of them), baseball, gymnastics/cheer leading (although not as much), she doesn't have much time to catch a breath.  She won't tell anyone "no" so she is on the swim board, she id the treasurer for the swim team, she is active in the year-round swim, she is treasurer for church, and on and on.

Now if I really reflect on it - there is no way I can do the shopping anymore.  My back begins to feel like someone has skewered me on a huge sword.  The pain is such I begin to sweat.  I look for a place to sit.  She knows this, so for both of our sake, she just goes when she has to.

Lady Bug used to want to spend time with me.  Now she is almost a teen.  When she has free time, and COULD get over here (one mile) on her own, she doesn't.  In fact I put myself into a huge funk when I had the Kindle sent to her.  That night - no call.  Found out it was Awards Night (which wasn't mentioned until after the fact - you make your decision about how I felt there), swim practice the other nights.  Finally on Sunday I got a quick kiss.

I have shared my blue funk with you, and I am sure you are quite bored.  So I will go along and just soak in it !   Such a "wise" decision!  NOT.

How things change!

From Friday when I got the email from our Associate in Ministry until yesterday, I was riding a roller coaster - and didn't know it when I got on.

We needed to provide meals to Sister Pastor.  She is having (today) her neck vertebrae fused.  She will be recuperating for two weeks.  When  I talked to her, she indicated she wanted meals every other day.  Ok so it will be.

Saturday I had three in the Women's Group volunteer.  Great.  I already had several, but this is great.  We have extras.  I figured we needed 8 meals (actually 7, but one lady is following up tomorrow which wasn't a scheduled day).

So I came home - listed the dates we needed food, asked prople to sign up AND say what they were providing.

Our member with ALS was the first to respond (both times I may add).  She did as I requested.  Then others came in - many not telling what they were providing.  Then we got several who are going to order from the chef in the neighborhood who does this for a living.  Great.  I was feeling pretty good.

THEN I was down to two days left.  There were no responses.  I thought Daughter and I would have to fill in those days.  I waited and waited.  Finally someone responded.

I sent out an email thanking all for stepping up or considering to bring food.  That email was followed up with a response of "I don't see June 22.  I will take that one."

I am not that stupid.  I wouldn't have sent the email with the message that it was all taken care of if it hadn't been.  Geesh.  So I nicely responded back thanking her once again but all spots were, indeed, taken.

Something that I really thought would have been a slam dunk turned out to be a real pain.  I guess that's the way things go.  What appears easy on the surface really isn't when you dig further.

Oh, well - done.  Now I will get her  "get well prayer angel" into the  mail.  It might be there before the weekend even.

I am so in love!

Oh yes.  I am so in love - with my Kindle.  Now if truth be known I don't love the Fire as much as the plain vanilla Kindle. But that little thing may be the issue that causes what I consider a problem with the Fire. The plain one is hard to see, so I have an external light.  The Fire is very visible, and that makes the battery not last which is what I don't like about it.

I also am in love with the various places that offer free/discounted books.  At first I didn't think I would like these books.  After all I am such a literary snob (LOL).  But I have recently read three free books that I have absolutely adored.

I went ahead and became an Amazon Prime member so I could borrow books there.  At first I was a little disappointed with the selection.  Once again - no best sellers by big authors.  I have really enjoyed all but one of those books,

I can't believe in the last four weeks I have read three books.  I know - some of you read a book in a week or less.  I only read before bed, and I usually fall asleep after about 5 pages, so it takes me a while to read a book.  My "library" in the bathroom always has a book (paper back).  So I read about a page to a page and a half at a time and in three months I am half through that paper back.  I'll get there.

I cannot stand to just sit.  I have to have a book, sewing, something.  I always have a book with me.  There is one in the door of the car.  It is one of the "Girl With ..." books by the Swedish author.  I found it boring, but to have in an emergency - it's great.

I really though I would never give up the real books in my hands.  I thought I wouldn't like the Kindle, but I love, love, love it.  I don't lose my place when it slips out of my hands when I fall alseep!

Run, run, run

Today was my sewing club.  The project was/is little flip flop like coasters - really cute.  But I just wasn't into bumping the 50 pound machine down and back up the steps today.  So I went, bought the packet of material, sat for a while.  Only three people brought machines.  So there wasn't much instruction, but I am fairly confident that I am able to read the instructions that are in a PDF file!

Then I went to get glasses.  You know, when we have insurance that provides free frames, and what it showed was a credit of $130 I should have been able to get my glasses at a fairly low price.  Yeah, in my dreams.  I am so vain that I MUST have progressive lenses.  I don't like that line across my field of vision.  Then the salesperson convinced me that transitions are better than they were, so I bit.  Then the coating that protects, and on, and on.  Finally $230+.  I am just happy that the macular degeneration was settled down to the point that I am able to get new glasses.  I am not sure the lenses are big enough for the progressive part.  These old ones cut into the reading field.  We will see.

From there I went to the craft/fabric store so I could spend more money on these blasted diaper cakes.  I needed ribbon. Plus I will make the little baby washcloth corsages again.  So I needed the wire (of course I can't find my BOX of floral wire), better florist tape and corsage pins that wouldn't hold a bridal bouquet on the girl's chest.

I went to the bank to put the check for the house in San Antonio directly into my checking account because if I don't I will be overdrawn in a short time.  The $400 vet bill before Simone died was quite a blow.  If I don't have to use that money, I will move it to the money market account where it belongs.

Then I called home to see if G needed or wanted anything.  I offered to pick up lunch for him, but he had eaten.  SO I went to the Golden Arches.  I do like their salads, but I can never remember the name of the salad I love.

Of course when I got there, there was  no line, and someone pulled in behind me.  I don't visit there often, so I am not familiar with their drive through menu - besides it changes every time I go through!!  So I asked for the Southwest salad.  It wasn't what I had in mind, but at least it  made me get through easily.

It was good, and I enjoyed it  - until I forgot there was a lime wedge in the salad.  I was finishing the salad off when I put something horrid into my mouth.  It was that blasted lime.  Yuck.  What a gruesome end to a fairly nice morning!

Long

Last Friday, as you possibly know, was a terrible day for the Houston Fire Department.  They lost four brave firefighters in the horrible motel fire.  There is a good side - we are more than fortunate that that dive burned down, but to take the life of four heroes is horrible,

One of the firefighters was also with our little city fire department.  My family feels a closeness with these fallen heroes because G, Daughter and Son were all in the department here for a while.  So even if Firefighter Bebee had not been with our local department, we still would have felt a kinship with these people.

They have been showing the memorial service for these folks this mornings. It began at 10, and it is 12:15 and still going on.  I don't begrudge the memorial, but the uncle on one of the firefighters spoke first.  He rambled on and on for at LEAST 30 minutes.  I really believe it was more like 45.

At one point, two on the dais people went up to him, but he just brushed them off saying "I'm OK."  And he went on and on.

I complain.  But it is a very sad day.  To have one firefighter give his life is sad.  This is the worst thing that has happened to HFD.  They still have another man who is in critical condition in an induced coma.  I pray he makes it.

_____________________________________________________________________________

When I was writing on Sunday, I think I used too many pronouns in the last paragraph.  My son and DIL are close friends with one of our local police.  Son and DIL were on their way here for dinner when they saw the Officer patrolling.  They invited him to come by the house to chat.  He did so, but had his blasted lights going.  That got the attention of our neighbors who came out of their houses to see what was going on!!

I do have to add this to the story.  My neighbor across the street, Lynn, really believes that the folks living on her east side are into illegal activities.  Of course, when they slaughtered the baby goat hanging from the basket ball goal in the driveway, I guess that rather set her attitude about them!!

She thinks they might be running drugs.  I don't know.  From what she talks about, it could be since they were taking the seats out of a Suburban that they were taking to Mexico and putting something in it.

Anyway - IF they are involved in something illegal, I am sure they were sweating seeing this particular officer out there.  He is the one who has been investigating them!  Not that they know I think, but he really wanted to bust them!

That makes our neighborhood sound terrible.  It isn't so.  This is a strange situation over there.  They don't own the house.  A guy from the north somewhere owns the house.  He bought it so that he would have a place to stay when he comes to visit his son who lives nearby.  So strange, strange!!!

A new day

And it's some better than before.

I survived playing for church.  It wasn't perfect, but then what do you expect from a 67 year old woman who retired from playing for churches 12 years ago, has arthritis in most of her fingers (from playing keyboard for 61 years, and is nearly blind in one eye (and can't see out of the other as the old joke goes).   We have someone who sings into the mike to lead singing.  Yesterday, we had the young woman who is really cute and sweet.  She was running late.  I thought "no problem" because we had old hymns.  Problem!  She didn't know the two middle ones, and we had no time to go over them.

The other problem was that the words that are projected on screens didn't match the words in the books we had.  In fact, my version of one hymn had three verses - the one on the screen had four!!  But we gpt through it.

The "workship" went so well.  We needed layers for 20 diaper cakes, and I think we may have gotten 35 or so.  AND we had diapers left over.  Successful indeed.  We make these into decorated cakes on Saturday.  I will only be there for a bit - my son's oldest son is having his delayed from February splash birthday party.  Even in Texas we don't have splash parties in February.

My mood took a nose dive when I checked Facebook yesterday however.  I am still very active (with money anyway) with the local Boxer rescue.  G first said that absolutely we will not have another dog, but reading "the last will of a dog" that said the best way to honor your deceased dog is to have another, he is ready to adopt again.  But we will wait until after September.

In September, we are going to Alaska for a train convention, and then immediately to San Antonio for my 50th high school reunion.  I doubt that my real friends will attend.  I don't think they attended the other reunions, but then I didn't either.  Somehow we were always traveling then.  Amazing - but we managed to  make G's.  Hmmm.  Anyway, with the busy month, I was always worried about Simone if she were still alive.  I could just see her taking a bad turn and not making it to the end of our trip.  I hated the thought of her dying while in boarding.
d
So with that history - I always read the updates from the Boxer rescue.  Some of those babies stay around for a while, and who knows, I might meet my new dog!  But yesterday, they had an emergency rescue.  Someone dropped a 15 year old (which is absolutely amazing - they usually only live 8 -10 years) boxer at a high kill shelter.   I guess they wanted her euthanized  there so they didn't have to be bothered.

As I was reading the comments, I was crying my eyes out.  I knew my pain was just too fresh.  I couldn't bring her in here only to have her pass soon.  Others had the same comment.  They had just put their precious ones down recently.  Even the ones who had previously had to put their 8 - 10 year olds were saying how they would have loved to have had them five years longer.  The comments were like this throughout.  I cried and cried.

The good news is that either by people taking some of the dogs that are in the vet offices to foster, or taking her (and another one who was found) both girls will be pulled today.

I can't understand people like this.  Just two weeks ago, someone took their 9 year old to a high kill shelter because hI simply cannot imagine doing this.  Beyond me.

So - on other fronts - family dinner was good - not as great, but good.  My DIL had all our neighbors out looking because she is very good friends with one of our policemen.  In fact, they went to prom together.  They saw him when they were coming in, and told him where they would be.  So he shows up - with his lights on!!!    He parks in front, and Son and DIL go out to talk to him.  We had most of the neighbors out wondering what the problem was!!  What a way to end a Sunday evening!

Better

Today IS a better day.  It couldn't get a lot worse, but I am not going to temp fate and say it couldn't get worse.  Oh, yes it could!

Yesterday I was very low - depressed.  That really doesn't happen often, but it did yesterday.  I just couldn't  find my "happy spot."

I've heard it said that once you get the "C" diagnosis, you appreciate each and every day.  And I guess that is right for the most part, but yesterday (and Thursday too really) I was very weepy.  I realize I am still mourning Simone.  That will go on for a while.  To be honest, there are times I mourn my other Boxer, Taz.  He has been gone about 10 years.

Part of my mood may be attributed to the fact that I said I would play keyboard tomorrow for church.  I was allowed to pick hymns, but I was pressured into one that I knew I really wasn't good at.  I am still having a time with it.  I have been away from church playing for at least 11 years, and my vision and arthritis combined give me a hard time.  But I said I would do it, so I am.

We are also making diaper cakes tomorrow for the group that tries to give support to teens and other girls who are pregnant - and didn't really mean it.  This group supports them to get through high school and NOT get pregnant again. They are armed with the tools to just say no to these boys!

Anyway, our congregation has "workships."  In this one, we will roll the diapers they have contributed into little rolls that will be put into a two-layer "cake" which at our Women's meeting, we will "ice" with the decorations.

All these things coming together are just pressure, and I think I react by withdrawing.  That means that I am in this little dark place  - with my thoughts.  Not a good place then.

Hopefully, tomorrow afternoon, the skies will brighten (although our forecast is for rain!).  But I am looking forward to getting out of this cave back into the light!

Another goof - and this time, not mine!

As we all know - there cannot be a single activity that kids are in where there is not a fund raiser anymore.  Schools, band, cheer leading, sports.  They all have them, and often these fund raisers are in addition to fees that the parents pay for the kids to participate even.

And so it is for the year around swimming group to which Lady Bug Senior (have to do that since Son's daughter it Lady Bug or Lainey Bug depending upon which time she is addressed) belongs.  They have to raise money for a swim-a-thon.  Catchy isn't it??

She and her mom (Daughter) spent one Saturday addressing envelopes to send out to beg for money - this was along with all the other competitive swimmers.  Of course, there were prizes.  She had her heart set on a Kindle Fire.

 I told Daughter I would wait to pay  donate my money until it was determined just how much more she needed to hit this level of prize.  And I am still waiting.  And she has a prize - an underwater (fitting) MP3 player(??) which I don't believe she thinks much of.

I found this out on Monday when we went to their house for dinner.  So I said I would spend the money that I was going to spend and just buy the Kindle.  Daughter said to wait for her birthday.  Nope - that's in January for Pete's sake.  Then Daughter said LB had enough that she could buy her own Kindle.

That wasn't good for me.  So I came home, opened my good old Amazon account and ordered her Kindle which is to be delivered tomorrow.

Do I spoil this girl?  The simple answer is yes, absolutely.  I try to make sure the others get things too.  I really try to not have a favorite, but she is the oldest.  I have known her the longest, and for that matter I kept her while mom worked the longest.  We do have a history.

So what will I do for the other two in that house.  Well, the  little one I will give the bandanna dress I have almost finished.  I will try to get a picture of it today before it goes.  Monkey Boy is going to be more of a challenge.  But I did promise him a trip to the bookstore right after school is out for the summer.

The remaining three will know nothing of this deal although I did volunteer to make this little lolly pop holders that are T rex.  He has a love of dinosaurs, and his birthday party has been postponed from February to June since he wants a splash party.  Feelings hurt, but OK.  In the picture, there is a starlight mint - not a lolly pop.  I don't have any of those!  And the ribbon is too short - I just used that one for demonstration purposes

Sunday Dinner

We had the best dinner that we have had in ages!  It was easy since I used the other tray of King Ranch Chicken left over from Community Club.  DIL brought salad and cookies, SIL brought bread and wine.

I knew the little kids were coming early to swim.  Of course, this is the season when the pool can be nasty thirty minutes after cleaning it.  When we planted the pecan tree, we never had a vision of a pool.  So we get the blooms from the tree in the pool.  In the fall, it's the leaves.

I was surprised when the others showed up to swim a little later.  Their pool is smaller and more shallow.  So they enjoy swimming in ours.  They will especially love it when we get the slide working again!

To cut to the chase, it was a delightful evening.  All the kids were in good moods.  The adults didn't have to get up the next day.  It was just a lot of fun.

I got an album out that was my mother.  Lady Bug was talking about who was her biological great-grandmother.  I have been working on an album of her high school years.

Son then went to get albums of he and his sister - he was looking for a particular picture.  In that album, there were pictures of Daughter in prom dresses and dance dresses.  They still hang in the closet in the study.  So Daughter went to get them.

Lady Bug tried them on:

Her swimmer's tan really shows up here.  The top one, gold one, was  really chosen by her date at the time.  The other one, I made for her 8th grade dance.  Lady Bug is in sixth - going into seventh.  We were amazed that the dresses FIT her.  They are wrinkled since they were folded on a hanger, but I was amazed how good they looked on her.  She is a pretty girl - not really dressed to model dresses.  She was amazed that her mother was her size!  The gold one was when Daughter was in 10th grade.

What fun!

We did go to Trivia night last night, and we had a great time.  We ended up with Pastor C and a young man (relative of two of our members - and I am  not sure of the relationship at all).

Our group was really the ideal group.  G and I aren't really good at trivia, but our age added to the group since we knew some of the "old" things.  The young man was in his 20's, PC is 40, and then us in our 60's.

The game is five rounds of ten questions on a topic, followed by an eleven question bonus.  We rocked the first three: the sit com a character came from, F in History (which I thought would kill me, but it was easy), the names of a singing duo and we named the group (glad we had the kid), a picture of the emblem for superheros with us naming said hero (PC and the kid had that one!), finally three word quotes from movies and we gave the movie.  That one killed us.  We had gotten all ten questions on all but the last one - movies.

We were in first place all evening - until the movie category.  We went to second.  The bonus didn't help us even though we got all eleven points.  It was naming all the states with six or less letters in the name.  All the groups got all eleven, so by two points, we lost!

But it was really great fun.  There are things, as you well know, that I don't really like about our church.  But there are so many things like this night that I love.  Change in the format of the service is still difficult, but change in other things like this are really great.  I just wish others would come out to enjoy these activities.

Our keyboard player has moved on to another church.  We do that.  In all my years (like 50 off and on) I was organist at at least five churches).  I have been asked to fill in occasionally.  It will be only occasionally mostly because I am not a modern music keyboard player.  I was classically trained, and the jazzy, rocky stuff is not something I do well with.  Also we are gone for a service a month, and my vision is really bad for reading music.  But on June 2 I will be the keyboardist.  I get to pick the hymns (yeah!) but still - playing with "The Band" really is daunting!

Happy holiday!

Phew!

G contacted an attorney in The Little Town.  What we have, because the road has been there forever, is a prescriptive easement.  I knew there had to be something.  I studied real estate back in 1976, but that has been a long time ago.  I couldn't remember all the ins and outs of real estate law.

So, if we have to, we will sue.  G has decided we will build a road - sometime.  My thought is to tell Mr. Neighbor we have the right to that road, now you want to make it legal the easy way, or do we go to court.

I have thought of other things looking for a silver lining to this cloud.  If we build a new road, it would go close to her house.  Someone who has thoughts of breaking into our house won't go close to another house trying to get to ours I really don't believe.  But, I still don't want to build another road.

Mr Neighbor's wife appears to not be in step with her husband.  She was supposed to come over with him.  Instead, she took their dog to get his yearly shots.  She also has commented on some Facebook postings, and she has sent me two little nothing emails about things up there.

Looking forward to a simple day.  Tonight we will go to trivia night at church.  We are not your regular church, as I think I have pointed out before.  We do different things.  Like the dinners that we have for various holidays and the like.  People are surprised that we encourage folks to bring their wine and beer if they want.  Same with the Trivia nights.  We bring a snack to share and if we want it, beer or wine.  We are a little different.  But I believe the society needs some churches that don't march to the same drummer.  Churches are dropping members right and left.  Let's hope we can bring some back.

What can top l

Actually nothing.  Encountering hogs with only the .38 revolver - with rat shot.  Almost running over three in the road, and the snake.  That is about as exciting as it gets.

Unless you add in our neighbor coming over for a "neighbor to neighbor chat" that really meant that he was going revoke our access through his property meaning we have to build another road, and install a new gate.

The road that is there has been there for at least 50 years.  There are property owners behind us who were the ones who built that road.  This was all family land, and the use of that road was by agreement.  When it was built, the only ones were the landowners at the end of the road and my in-laws.  Since then, a tract ( the one I am referring to) has been sold to an outsider.  Our tract was sold to us - still family.

Nothing has ever been said about easements - until Monday.  This person wants to close our gate and road because it is on a hill that washes down to the road.

I am not going into great detail - it's not a necessity.  We are just flat amazed here.  When he found that we had to get an easement when we put the house in and the crappy attorney didn't take into account the existing road did the easement just through G's sister's property.  No road there.

We didn't think about pursuing the other easement.  The road has always been there for use.  He has had the property for 27 years.  Never wanted one before.  Humph.

                                 **************************************

I have spent the last two days volunteering at an elementary school.  Our church has adopted this school.  We participate in a "backpack program" where we pick up non-perishable foods that the needy kids take home for weekends and we hold the "store."

The kids get "bucks" for good behavior.  Several times a year we hold a school where they can "buy" little (trashy) items.  The kids love it.

Why am I mentioning it?  Well - I fell getting up the stairs to the stage yesterday.  I have talked about not being able to kneel because of the fake knees.  Well, I landed on them.  Hard.  I don't think there is any real damage.

The railing was obscured.  I thought I could make it.  My knees are not really strong enough to do that.  So down I went.  I really believe I was far more embarrassed than hurt, but still.  I am really sore today.  My muscles across the upper back are very sore, and I think I probably hurt my lower back more than anything.

Klutz.

The good, the bad, and the unfortunate

And sometimes they are all the same.

Some of you follow on Facebook, and you read my post from last night.  When we returned from the Community Club meeting, we faced all three.

First - the meeting went well.  The King Ranch Chicken was well received even though we had a pan and a half left.  The Bingo game was a little messed up.  We had mixed two inexpensive game sets.  So the numbers I used were less that the game cards, but it was fun even  though it was HOT.  We had 101 in this area yesterday, and the same if predicted for today.

Now last night.  The first thing was the pigs on the road.  You probably have heard of feral pigs.  They are a real problem here in Texas, and in the South for that matter.  They can be dangerous.

Usually, they are a little reclusive.  AND they aren't usually seen around here in the day time.  Well, that is changing.  G has seen them out in the day twice now.  The first time they ran when they heard him.  The other day, he fired the revolver at them (with rat shot so he knew it wouldn't do anything just hoped to scare them away).  They didn't move.  They are getting gutsy.  This may happen more often in places where people live because they are used to people.  Not around here though.

Last night there were three "piglets" on the road into our place.  They were rather close to the house.  These were like teen aged pigs.  I will bet they could be breeding at their size.  The fact they were fairly close and not afraid of the truck really scares me.  I don't want to be out at night (and now day) and come upon a herd of them.  They can and are vicious.  Their tusks can slice and tear.  I am really glad we are putting up a fence that it hog proof - or as much so as it can be.  When we get another dog, there isn't as much danger of the pigs being around.

Then when G was going to open the back sliding glass door, there was a snake right outside the door.  It had darker diamond shaped markings.  In this country, you don't take much time to check it out completely when it is right outside your door.

I was getting out of the truck with the partial tray of food when he told me to get back in the truck.  That was because the snake was headed for me.  It left the deck and headed for under the truck.  To cut to the chase, it stayed around.

G got the shot gun, and dispatched the snake.  This is where it becomes a story of the good and the unfortunate.  It was a good snake.  But we measured it this morning.  It was four feet long plus.  We are pretty sure it was a coachwhip.  They are beneficial.  But any snake that is against the door on the deck isn't necessarily a good snake.  Our hunter has been really snake wary these days.  Between him and G, the high weeks are kept low around the house and cabin.

Do I wish the snake had gotten away.  Absolutely.  I have a great fear of snakes that I have tried and tried to get over through the years.  It is still there, although not as bad.  When I was a young kid, I couldn't even tough the PICTURE of a snake.

It probably stems from the time when my parents and I lived in the country.  I was about 4 and followed my dad out  to check on the turkeys we had at the time.  When I would get scared, I would squat down and freeze.  This night it was a great thing.  Between me and my dad was a large rattle snake.  Somehow who ever went first managed to get around it.  I have been afraid of snakes since.

So what would have seemed like not a real problem is a big one.  Those pigs are going to grow and reproduce.  They are closer to the house than ever.  They are dangerous.  The snake was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.  Both situations are sad.

I really had too close a relationship with wildlife last night - even for me who basically trained as a wildlife biologist!

Arrrrrgh

We are here at the SSB.  Things have been, well let's say, interesting.

I will begin with the most recent first.  It gets better, you see.  The whole family laughs at G's sense of timing. When all the work is done - he appears asking if help is needed.  He also has the uncanny timing of wanting to be in the kitchen when I am trying to prepare food.  You will notice I did not say cleaning the kitchen, didn't you??  And no, he isn't just being loving.

When we were here last, at the Community Club meeting, it was announced that there were no host for this month's meeting.  I was looking around the room, not making eye contact with anyone when my darling husband announces "we'll do it."  Please read there - Karen will do it.

So we decided on a menu.  At the time two weeks ago, it was still unseasonably cold.  I thought King Ranch Chicken.  A moderately spicy casserole that is pretty easy to prepare, and everyone knows we have chicken now.  He decided we would play Bingo.  Guess who went to the dollar store to buy prizes.  Yep, none other than little old me.  Who checked the pantry.  Me.  Today who cleaned out the ice tea dispenser?  Me.  Who will make the iced tea?

So when I am ready to begin my catering for this shindig, who decides that it is time for him to clean the kitchen?  Yep - G.  Who had been sitting on his duff reading a book for two hours?  Yep, G.  He left me no counter room to work, and while after boiling the chicken, most of the work is chopping onions, bell pepper, dicing the chicken, and then opening cans.  There are three cans to open per batch.  And one bag of cheese. Just takes a lot of room.

As I was trying to load this meal into the oven (I am so glad I am doing it here - it is a large oven!), he waltzes to the utility room and begins to rummage through one of the cabinets.  As I take the cans to the trash can in there, (and where the noisy a/c unit is) he walks around the corner saying "we will set off bug bombs when we leave."  I stupidly ask why, and by this time he is in the bedroom, and all I hear is the roar of the a/c and the crashing of cans hitting the floor because I can't open the lid to the trash.

After disposing of the trash, I walk to the bedroom to find him in the bathroom.  His comment was "there are little blying bugs all over this house (and I will explain why in a bit) and a spider in the garden tub with the cat food.  Shadow would get fed there so Simone wouldn't dine on his food too.  Then he goes on to say "but I used Yard Guard to spray the spider and it went all over the place so now I have to dump the food and wash the bowls."  Really??  No kidding.  So it did what it was supposed to do.  For one little spider???

We will see what happens tonight.  The weather gurus keep saying that some severe thunderstorms could pop up over the Texas hill country tonight (it is only 100+ in town (Mason) so that is a good possibility.  We will probably get to load all this stuff (although I would love to use another descriptor) and when we get there to unload.  There probably won't be but three people show up.  So my five prizes will be mine, and I will have enough King Ranch Chicken for all the cowboys in the bunk house - if we had any of those fellas.

Now - what else has been going on.  Last week, our neighbor on the other mountain called.  There was a severe hail storm that came through on Thursday night.  He got into his "chiller" that is turned on when he has his hunters here and processes their deer meat.  He said the folks down from us have metal roofs.  They were beat up pretty severely.  My little SIL had a window broken, and it appeared we only had two screens torn.  Got off lucky.  I thanked him profusely for checking.  But of course, when he checked that gave him the perfect opportunity to come over to see what the fence builders were doing over here (the feral hogs are getting too close to the house, and they are becoming very aggressive).

We got here Tuesday.  G went to get some water because the neighbor said he turned it on to the house.  There was none.  While he went out to turn it on (we normally leave it off we have had the ice maker go nuts and flood the freezer part), I was going to turn on a light.  No lights.

I went to the breaker box and flipped the switch.  Nothing.  I told him there was more of a problem than the water being turned off.  We had no water because when they were pouring the cement they emptied the pressure tank - and it's pretty large.

No power meant no phone.  especially since we changed the type of telephone.  Our bill was about  $90/month.  That is really high for being here one week a month.  We went to Ma Bell with a system that is essentially a cell phone for the house.  It is a base receiver that you attach your phones to, and it has to be close to a window.  It is $30 before taxes and fees (that gouge!)  But that meant no phone.  So having all of our hurricane stuff here, I had a power supply that I hooked my cell to because it was going dead (of course), and we could call the power company.

There were many associated mishaps with all of the business.  I won't bore you.  Lets just say that G is as useful in mechanical things as tits on a boar hog!  The power company was here in less than an hour.  A hail stone knocked the fuse away from the transformer - thus no power for us and the hunter's cabin.

I spent the remainder of that day cleaning out the refrigerator. I was so thankful that things were still pretty cool - so they didn't stink - even after 5 days.  The little chest freezer really kept things.  There was still ice in it!

These are my tales of woe.  We have an hour before we leave.  I guess I will pack up all the things that need to go - you know I have to be the one - and we will hope for the best!
 

Geesh

I know you are tired of me talking about Simone, but this isn't really about her.

We had asked for her ashes to be returned - at a rather high price too, but she was special.  They called Saturday night, but it was closing time for the clinic.  I have had this feeling that something wouldn't be right - like we would get ashes, but they wouldn't be Simone.  So I went yesterday to pick them up (yeah, Happy Mother's Day).

When I got to the car, I looked at the name on the box.  It was "Simah" not "Simone."   I thought that was just an anomaly since we have never kept the ashes before.  When I got home, I took the wooden box out of the plastic one, and sure enough there was "Simah" on the plaque.

G said there was a mix-up of the ashes.  I thought it was just an error on the plaque.  He said we should take them back right away.  Since we were hosting Sunday Dinner with the family, I said it could wait.

This morning as I was fixing my breakfast, the phone rang.  It was the clinic.  They were apologizing profusely.  The owner of "Simah" was there with Simone.

So, to cut to the chase, G took the ashes back and brought Simone home.  She also got to ride along on his route of errands.

Not sure about this

Things are getting more normal about these parts.  G has had enormous guilt about us going ahead with putting Simone down.  It was coming - whether on Wednesday or in the very near future.  He left the room shortly after it was done, and Dr J stayed to talk to me.  She assured me at least twice it was the right things to do.  So I felt better about it.

So what's my problem today?  You know I have to have one.  G, in his ultimate choices, told the kids to come over here tomorrow night.  WHAT???  I really am not sure I am ready for this.

My daughter knows me well.  She just called after he called the "boys" to make sure it was OK.  She said we could be at her house.  I am really not ready for that.  She has the two Boxer girls.  Angelica, the one I wanted to foster but she decided she wanted to eat Shadow, would give me Boxer kisses all night.  While I really love that little dog, I am not ready for that.

I was going to like to that post because at this later time, it really was a funny experience.  Angelica was hot on Shadow's tail.  Literally!  But I don't know how to do that - especially since Blogger has changed over the years.

After all plans were set with the guys - G then stopped here at the table and said "of course, I don't know what we are going to have."  Sheesh - Happy Mother's Day to me!!  He had told them he "would take care of everything."  Men - honestly.

So I shouldn't complain or moan.  I get to have my kids, their spouses, and the six grand kidlets about.  That isn't the way it is for every grandmother.

On another note - my step granddaughter has pulled another stunt.  She never calls her dad and step-mom (my daughter).  That is, until she needs something.  That whole side of the family it like that.  They know that SIL and daughter are wise with their money.  When that family needs money - the phone rings.

Step gd and live in baby daddy want a new car.  They don't have money and cannot get financing for less that 12%.  Tell you anything??  So first they wanted a co-signer, then it was they wanted SIL/daughter to finance the car and they would pay them.  I don't know what turnip truck they think people fall off, but this takes the cake.

Step gd wasn't even going to tell them about her baby's first birthday party because there is much unrest due to a loan to SIL's sister of $1800 last year that was promised to be repaid.  They have gotten $200.  Oh what a mess that bunch is!

And they hate my daughter??  I think she has finally learned that she cannot do anything right in their eyes except put them on a monthly supply of money, and even then she would be a "pretentious b*tch" and it is an exact quote.

Anyway - Happy Mother's Day to you all.

Down memory lane

This year we will be having our high school 50 year reunion.  OK - now you know my age.  I once kept that a deep, dark secret.  Having cancer can surely change that!  You begin to celebrate each and every year because you almost didn't achieve it!

A classmate and others posted a really beautiful portfolio of pictures of our high school.  It is one of a kind.  It was built in about 1935.  It is in the Moorish style.  It was, and still is thanks to the Historical Society.  The make-up of students has changed a lot.  Where once it was mostly middle and upper class, it is now a school for the lower socio-economic kiddos.  I think many of the traditions have been lost, but I hear of moves to bring them back into the school.

Knowing that I have such fun posting pictures on Blogger, here I go anyway!

This is the front of the school.  I never used this entrance in my years there.  It faces the "main street."  The dome would be lit following football games we won.  

This is the other side of the front of the campus.  I had a Geometry class in that wing there to the left on the first floor.  There is yet another entrance there.  It is also a main one.  Makes me wonder how these many, many entrances are being controlled after all the school shootings that have happened.

This is the way I would enter the school especially when I was old enough to drive.  This is the back of the school.

This is just one of the many patios that are around the school.  There are about four all together.  It really gave you something to enjoy during classes on the first floor.  Perhaps that's why I wasn't as good in math.  Those were the classes scattered all over the first floor.  We had a total of three floors - and five minutes between classes.

 Just one of our "famous" graduates, and we had many including Alan (?) Ludden who used to host Password.  This is Tommy Nobis who went on to be a star player at University of Texas, and then played for Atlanta Falcons.  Sweet guy!  He graduated the year before me.

 This is our "pep squad."  The Lassos.  I am somewhere in the center on the back row.  If you look closely, you will see ropes attached to our belts.  We had a Roping Team.  All Lassos, though, had to be able to twirl the rope around us and various other tricks.  The Roping Team could do fancier ones.

 This was my senior year.  And the "dream" activity of the cheerleader and her boy friend, the football star.  I think they married.  And I believe he went on the play pro ball.  The blonde on the left is my best friend at the time, so I am probably next to her.  This line was a privilege for Lasso seniors.

 This is a view from the stage in the auditorium.  It certainly can be intimidating.  I found that out when I was the lead in the Lasso play my senior year.  But it is so beautiful

 This is the hallway outside the auditorium.

 This is taken from the auditorium balcony.  The proscenium arch doesn't show as it should.  It is multicolored as you would expect for the Moroccan influence.

This is from the area where I spent many hours.  This is the third floor library where study hall was held.  You had a study hall class everyday!  I notice there aren't as many tables there in this picture!



And so that is a thumb nail tour of Thomas Jefferson High School in San Antonio, Texas.  It was a wonderful place to go for high school.  It is still dear to me.  Even the alums keep up with the school.  We have our own Facebook page.  There was just something that brought reverence.  Of course, when I was there, it was legal for kids to attend whatever high school in the city they wanted to.  So Jeff was the choice for a lot of the kids.  They came from all over the city.  G grew up on the other side of town, and many of his friends rode the bus (until they could drive) for a long time to get to school

Good bye my sweet baby

This was the day.  I almost cancelled the euthanasia.  It was a good day for her.  She showed an interest in things.  She walked some around the back yard, and she seemed like she felt good.

But this is a road well traveled these days.  She was on four medications.  Tomorrow probably wouldn't be a good day, and we would be going through the sadness once again.  And she would be suffering.

I wanted Dr J to say that we could wait.  I wanted her to say that she was doing so much better.  I wanted to bring her home.  But she didn't say that.  She assured me I was doing the right thing.

Before Dr J came in, the receptionist who was with us in the room was crying.  It is obvious the staff at the clinic really cared for Simone also.  She was so sweet to everyone.  When you live closely with one, you know they are more than that.  They have personalities.  Hers was kind and gentle.  I would like to think she will meet up with Taz, my first Boxer.  I would like to think he will show her around and ease her fears.

Thank you for reading.

Goings on

Seems as though this is another week of seeing doctors.  Today was the Retinal Specialist.  That means another injection in the eye.  I must be getting used to them - it didn't hurt as much.  The good news is that the eye is responding, the vision is improving, and that there is still some fluid there.  I was thinking to myself - sure, good news for the doctor - more money.  But he did say that it was good because that meant the vision could improve more.  I know when I don't have to go each month, there will be new patients to take my place.

Thursday, I go to Dr Poison.  Six weeks ago, I had a pretty severe vitamin D deficiency.  I have been taking a 50,000 mg pill every Saturday since then.  If my level is correct now, I will take a simple supplement.  The real kick in the butt is that when I had the blood drawn, I was given a sheet from the lab stating that medicare won't pay for the check.  It is too soon - regardless for the reason.  Great.  When there is a problem like this ...

My DIL gave me a "starter" for Amish friendship bread.  I believe today is bake day.  You mess with the starter for ten days, then bake.  It is absolutely delicious.  She made G some to take to the SSB for his birthday.  I am looking forward to baking it - and I hope I can find two glass loaf pans.  I don't usually use loaf pans, and the only one I know about having is, of course, six hours away at the SSB!

On the Simone front.  She has dodged another bullet.  Last night, we decided to have her put down today.  There was still no poop, and she is not interested in much of anything - with the exception of her food.  She doesn't "patrol" her back yard, and she spends more time in the bedroom in her crate.  She wants to sleep all the time.  We put the decision off for a day thinking that with constipation, she wasn't feeling well.

That seems to not be the case.  She is, at this writing, in her crate.  G is calling the clinic to see if Dr J is there.  I think this will be the end.  My mind says that it is time.  My heart says no.  I am not a reasonable one to make the decision.  I see a spark of life and am energized.  I have to rely on G at this point.  So we'll see.

Yeah, right.

My mood isn't a great one today.  I am way off base with my attitude, and this post is a result of that skewed view of things.

A member of my sewing group posted a note today.  She has been undergoing treatment for breast cancer, and was inspired by the last meeting.  They made the little heart pillows that mastectomy patients could use to shelter their mutilation (sorry - you were kind of warned about my mood).  I would  not have any use for one of these.  The problem with my tubes was accidently grabbing one when I was trying to straighten out whatever gown/pj I was wearing.  They are kept in with a little stitch.  So ...  you get the picture.

Anyway, she included a picture of her "ringing the bell" after completing chemo.  She remarked that she had gained weight from the drugs and steroids, and had been assured she would lose the weight since the chemo stopped.  I laughed  - a lot.  Yeah - just wait until you begin the little pill, whether one form or the other, and the weight just attaches itself to you for the long ride.

That was an ugly rant.  Sorry.

We may finally be seeing the end of our cold spring.  I know I am going to regret wishing for more normal temperatures.  We will be wishing for another cold front before you know it.

And the rising temperatures will have its effect on my poor old baby.  It is going to stress her - a lot.  Things are the same right now - a real roller coaster.  We are supposed to go to the SSB on the 14th.  I really think she is too fragile to make the trip, and I surely don't want to leave her.  The coming heat will add the final stress.  I lost two other dogs in July, and I am sure the heat added to the stress on their bodies.

Anyway - enough of my rants today.  Wishing you a good, comfortable week.

What a spring!

I know some of you who still are getting snow will hate me for complaining about our spring.  We have set record low temperatures for May several days running.  Our normal is a beautiful 63.  It has been in the 40's at night going up to mid 70's during the day.  The day temp is great, but these nights!

Now don't get me wrong, I am not ready for what is ahead for us in the summer months - high 90' or low 100's with a humidity to match.  I will be wishing for these great temperatures then.  What I want is the nights to stay a little warmer.  I want the money pit in the backyard to warm up.  I want to get in to get some exercise.  Swimming is the preferred exercise for my back and knees for that matter. If I were to get in, and if I survived the ensuing heart failure, I would become hypothermic in a matter of minutes.  I feel sorry for Lady Bug when she swims.  Her practice for the competition  league (the serious  one) is in a heated pool - just cold when they get out.  Practice for the summer league (the fun time for these serious swimmers because they can blow the others who just do summer   out of the water) is down at the city pool.   It is like mine - deep and not heated!   Those kiddos come out with blue lips the water is so cold.

Our church is going through some big changes (Yes, this is relevant to the topic!!).   We are nearly broke.  The pastor has taken another job, we had to give up the other space (we meet in a strip center) where the children had Sunday School, and we have gone to one service.  To make it more palatable, I guess, we celebrated these changes with a taco lunch.  Pastor said - it was so beautiful we would move the tables and chairs outside!

First, I will bet that p*ssed off the Subway just down from us since we took the end of the parking lot.  Secondly, the wind was rather biting and it was a little cold!  But we survived, and I just wish all our Sundays could be like this one.  We had a huge attendance.  I just hope the people there today remember what is going on.  I would hate to see us have to disband!

For those of you still having snow, I wish you warmth.  But I can't send it to you yet.

My sincere thanks

All of your kind words of support have meant so much to me.  We are still facing changes day to day.  I guess Simone is like all of us older folks (at least this older folk) in that she has good days and bad days.

Yesterday was a good day.  She was like her old self.  She ate well, and seemed to not be nauseous.  Early this morning was a different story.  She lapsed into diarrhea (sorry if TMI).

So we called the vet as she told me to do on Friday when I called about her old lady pills.  She leaks urine, and Thursday was a really bad day.  We were out of her pills, and I asked if we should go up on the dosage.   Dr J said she was working this weekend, and if we needed her ...

And we did.  So she got an injection for nausea and pills for the diarrhea.  I believe if we had requested her to be put down, the vet would have complied.  She went through this two years ago with her old dog.  She is really a great help to us.

Again, I know she is only an animal, but possibly the sweetest dog that ever walked the face of the earth.  She had a rough beginning to her life.  She was over bred, and abused in ways that I don't even want to know about.  She has the scars to prove it.  But I think we have given her a great life since, and she has returned the favor - many times over.  Now I just have to find the courage to give her the final greatest gift that I can give her.

Last Days

I think that's where we are with Simone.  She is sliding pretty fast.  She has been nauseous off and on for two weeks now.  Even when I give her two anti-nausea pills a day, that often isn't enough.

Yesterday she was acting really strangely.  She spent a lot of time in her crate.  That's not normal.  She usually is right beside me when I  am on the computer.  Not yesterday.

Last night, I saw she was getting really nauseous, so we went out (to try to keep from cleaning the house).  She didn't try to eat grass or anything, and she only coughed up a little once.  But alas, when she got in ...  well - TMI.

She has been acting really strange since Saturday night.  Of course, that night we had heavy rains and a lot of thunder and lightening.  She had an "accident" in the entry hall.  That almost never happens.  Then night before last, she had another problem,

Last night, I really thought, as I did during Spring Break, that I would be making "the decision" today.  I came up with a plan for today.  She would get the anti-nausea pills as often as she could have them around the clock, and she would eat every four hours so she would be getting all the food she was supposed to have.

She is still acting strangely.  She is very clingy.  Where I go - she goes.  I really don't think it will be long.  I have never had an older animal change like this.

One of these days, my attention will be changed to something else.  She just takes all my attention right  now.    I don't think she will be with us just a lot longer.

Same old story

Here we go again with Simone being the lead off.  Some folks feel that a dog is a dog is a ...    I know that.  Being close with two animal rescue groups, I see what some folks are able to do to their animals.  Sad.

Perhaps I go too far the other way, but she is as close to a child as a dog can be.  Anyway.  She is getting old - very old.  And with that she is getting sick.

The vet told me to give her the anti-nausea pills everyday.  In fact as often as I can.  That means she gets two a day (at $1 a pill!!).  Last night I didn't give her the pill.  I really wanted to see if she could get by with only one.  She couldn't.  Since the SSB, she has been nauseous.  I was thinking it was the water change.  We use well water there, and it is hard water.

Anyway, she  was showing signs of being sick again.  I can look at her eyes and know how sick she is.  Rather than clean up after her in the house again, I let her out.  She goes out and "grazes" then vomits.  So that's what I did.  But while I was doing that, the thought kept creeping in - she probably  needs to be put down.  I am not ready for that even when it really comes.

This morning, she is a chipper girl again.  Her eyes are bright.  She is pretty normal.  She has her pill.   When I think about almost putting her down two months ago, I cringe.  And she has another reprieve -  absolutely.

********************************************************************************
The weather was terrible here Saturday.  While we didn't get the worst part (7 inches) of the rain, we did get some heavy rain with deadly lightening.  So why is this a biggie?  Because we were supposed to go to a fund raiser where my son's band was playing.  I so wanted to see him.  Guess what.  We didn't go.

So we decided that when the drought gets bad again, I will shell out $50 for tickets that we don't use.

Yes, I am actually here!!

Last week we were the proverbial social butterflies.  It seems we do more when we are at the SSB than when we are home.  There is something terribly wrong with this picture!!

We got there on Thursday so that meant that we went to Fredericksburg on Friday to buy groceries.  Then Friday night was the little community club meeting.  That is a depressing meeting.  All the folks there are 60+.  It's not that there are no young folks in the community.  They are there - but they have high school age kiddos.  For those of you who have experienced that, you know there are lots of activities for the kiddos.  And this community is very tight knit - like most small towns.  SO everyone turns out.

Saturday was one part of the family's reunion.  This one is held every year.  This part of the family has spawned about 9 Methodist ministers - either by birth or marriage.  So it is certainly a tee-total thing.  Although, the community club is also across the road from that Methodist church, and all but two other people attend that Methodist church.  Strong beverages will show up there!!

The only reason I mentioned the tee-totaling event was we picked up my younger SIL.  She lives in the property right next to us.  She marches to a different drummer, and always has.  This is partially due to her parents.  She was the last child, only girl, and they let her be a real flower child.  She has gotten in trouble with addictions before.  So - to get to the point.  I noticed in addition to the sweets she had that we were to bring for Kaffee Klatch (we are German after all) she had a beer.  I silently giggled at that until ...  she spilled a little in the back seat.  When she asked for an opener for the next one, I was a little aghast.  But then, some things never change.  She doesn't have a key to our house because I know if she ran out of liquor at her place - she would be at ours to replace what she doesn't have.

We stayed a little differently this time.  Going on Thursday and returning on Thursday isn't our way these days.  It is usually Tuesday to Tuesday.  We stayed because the happy hour that the little community was at one of the other neighbors (and cousin's).  We are close to her. It was her husband that died several years ago from Lou Gehrig's disease.  She has re-married, and they were hosts (but see what I mean about this Methodist community???).

Her house is really easy to find.  You go to the main road, turn left and the first road to the left is hers.  She is the only house on that road.  But SIL didn't think she could find it!!  So we took her.  She  behaved well this time.

Coming back on Thursday really has me confused.  In my mind this should be Thursday or Friday at the latest.  Instead it is a stormy Saturday.  And wouldn't you know it, we are supposed to go out this evening.  And I have already bought the tickets.  We are getting really rough weather, and normally I would love it.  We need the rain so badly.  Again.  But I hate to go out in the rain.

Since it is a benefit, if we don't go, we can deduct the $50 for the tickets.  But if we don't go, I won't hear my son's band.  And I haven't heard his band in years.  It is almost all new people in it.  I really love to hear him, and I really would  like to see him.  Don't care about the Bar-B-Que that is included.  I want to hear the band.

In the meantime I am sitting here watching the lightening and LOUD thunder, wondering if our generator will kick on at any moment when the power fails.  I hear a siren in the distance.  I really hope someone's house didn't get struck.    

Thoughts

Sorry if I got carried away and maudlin yesterday.  Simone has seen me through some really tough times - cancer, chemo, and radiation.  She is special.

But her diagnosis got me to thinking.  ALS.  What a horrible disease.

We watched a friend/neighbor/cousin fight it at the SSB.  For the longest time, he wasn't diagnosed.  His malady was unknown.  Then they knew.  For him it hit his arms - especially the right.  One of the others up there was telling me about walking in the pasture with J and having him fall only to land on his face because his arms couldn't reach out to stop the fall.

He hit it pretty well.  He managed to find ways to get around using his arms - especially the right - most times.  I do remember the Community Club Christmas party where his wife had to feed him though.  A sight like that will break your heart.

J was an author as well as educator.  He managed to write one novel.   Did a good job too!  After his death became imminent, he wrote a book to his grandchildren about life and responsibilities which was also published.  It was quite amazing.

So why am I remembering J?  We have a young woman at our church who has ALS.  She also is amazing to me.  She always participates in things the Women's group needs - like food for things.   She takes her turn on hospitality - where she sets up refreshments for church days.  She works a full time job.  And she just got married about six months ago.

I spoke with her on Sunday.  She was curious about when the Women's Group met.  She would like to attend, but she has an ALS support group that day.

I have the desire to feel sorry for her.  The saying :life sucks" could so easily be applied here.  She is in the prime of her life.  Her ALS seems to have effected her legs first.  She is in a wheel chair.  She should have her whole, full life ahead.  I know what she has ahead, and I am sure she does too.   I know how J died.  I know what the end days were like.  And yet, even though I haven't asked her I really don't think she would welcome my sad feelings for her.

She is definitely added to my list of most respected people.

It IS a sad day

That goes without saying - the tragedy of the Boston Marathon.  This kind of thing is something that cannot be explained.  I just happened to turn on the tv shortly after coverage began.  It broke my heart.

I know there will be lots and lots written about this, so that is as much as I will say.  Others will cover it much more eloquently.

On the home front - today was Simone's Spa Day.  She is going for a bath and nail trim.  G and I decided to have one of the docs check her.  She completely wet her bed on Sunday.  She has never done that before.  Last year she began with bladder leakage.  I am sure she was used by a backyard breeder to have litter after litter (and God knows what else was done to her - based on the scars she has and broken canine teeth).  I think she was bred so much that she developed a constant urinary track infection that didn't allow her to conceive anymore.  We were constantly treating that for the first year she was with us.

Two months ago, I had given her a fourth of the weak tranquilizer before leaving the SSB.  She is very sensitive to medications - especially the tranquilizer, so she got very little to help take the edge off the trip.  She reacted to it as though I had given her 20 mg instead of about 2.  She was completely out of it.  She couldn't stand up.

So since then, we have noticed that her rear quarters are "wonky."  The vet also saw that (I asked for her to be evaluated).  It seems that there is something.  Cause - unknown.  The x-ray showed nothing abnormal in the spine.

Now comes the possible bad news.  She may have, because Boxers are prone to this, the dog equivalent of ALS.  It begins in the rear quarter - and moves up.

So she possible has Cushings which is caused by tumors.  She has had mast tumors removed - and we don't know if they were malignant.  We wouldn't put her into chemo at her age.  And now possible ALS.

We have  no idea what her real age is.  We adopted her December 2006.  At the time she was projected to be 5 years old.  That was impossible.  No way.  I am sure she was at least 1, probably more like 2.  That makes her 9.  Boxers life span is usually seven years.  Of course, they can live to 10 or 11.  She is nearing the end anyway you cut it.

So, we go along.  Loving her as much as we can.  Making her happy and comfortable all the while knowing that we have made her life so much better.    Do I feel silly taking such care of this dog - absolutely not.  I would go as far as needed to make her life comfortable, and I really wish I could have her live forever.  She has been such a companion and friend - giving unconditional love.

A good excuse ...

Is better than none, right?  Believe me, I've got hundreds of them.  My current one is the weather.  That's an easy one because it's beyond my control.  Can't do anything about it.

I would say we are having a normal spring here in Texas, but not really.  I always expect changeable weather.  You know, near summer temperatures one day and cool the next.  And that's what we are having with one exception.  Our cool days are record setting lows.

In a normal year, I would be relishing this glitch.  Believe me, we will have days when it is miserable.  Highs in the high 90's to low 100's with high humidity so you feel like you are steaming.   I will be wishing for the record lows we are recording now.

So why am I upset.  Well - it goes along with my excuse.  You see, this year I have planned to use that money pit we have in the backyard.  The one that when we put it in for the kids to enjoy.  The one that kept them from the city pool where all their friends were.  Yeah, that one.

We don't have a heater for it.  And even if we did, I wouldn't use it, unless it were solar.  Heading something like 10,000 gallons of water calls for a lot of natural gas.  Don't want to pay that bill.  And after it gets heated, what happens - it cools off again.  So these record low temperatures we are having are definitely negating any warming we are getting on the warm days.

So my excuse for not exercising is that the pool is so cold that I would have a heart attack if I were to venture into it.  I would get hypothermia and die.  Right in the pool.  So I can't exercise. Right?

What't that - what about the recumbent bike in the bedroom?  Well - it seems like it has a short in its wiring. You cannot set it for any resistance, and we all know that I am in such tip-top shape that I have to have good resistance.  Yeah, right.  Just using the pedals with no resistance will give me a plenty good workout.

Walking would be ok - but it doesn't take any time before the sciatica grips my back so.  This has become a vicious cycle.  My back is weak I am sure because I am so out of shape, but when I try to do something, my back feels like it is going to freeze.  Getting through the grocery store is quite a chore.  But I refuse to use one of those carts!

So I guess to begin a schedule of doing something physical (other than exercising my fingers on the computer) I will begin using the bike everyday until the pool becomes like bath water - which it will.  Then my excuse will be that the water is too warm and the swim isn't refreshing.

A good excuse ....

It seemed like a good idea at the time ...

Like many of you, I saw the article that stated that niacin could be helpful in fighting cholesterol, and it was an inexpensive way to do it - about seven cents a pill.  Since I have been on statins, and they caused me tremendous leg cramps.

I went to the cardiologist and told him that the leg cramp were just not tolerable, and he did but my on a powder that I mix with juice or Crystal Lite in the mornings.  It is working great, and I don't have any problems with it, but why not try the niacin.

As I was reading the bottle of niacin, it said "supports heart health and energy metabolism."  Hey sounds great to me, and it is cheap.  Two bottles for $4.50.  That's 120 pills for that price.  Beats prescription meds.

So bought two (it was buy one, get one free).  What frugal German can resist such a deal.

At lunch that day, I decided to take one.  Ok - work your magic.  Let's bring down those numbers even  more.  Perhaps it would work on the triglycerides.

About 4, I was sitting on the couch reading my book, and I started with a warm feeling.  Now it wasn't like a hot flash or simply being too warm.  I was just warm even though my feet were cold.  I remarked to G that I was feeling warm without being hot.  It was a strange feeling.  My ears felt like they were turning red - you know like a big blush.

Then my arms and chest under my shirt began to tingle.  Tingle isn't the exact word, it was like little sharp bits were attached to my blouse.  They it seemed like I was beginning to itch.

That's when it hit me - I was having an allergic reaction.  I reached for Simone's benydryl. and took two of them.  Well, that's what I told G.  I actually took three.  I figured if my 70 pound dog could tolerate three, my ### pounds (not gonna divulge that number - suffice it to say it is plenty over 70!) I could take three.  And if I were having an allergic reaction, I wanted to stop it here, not in the ER.

Then, G and I both looked up side effects of niacin.  It causes flushing in some people.  That is what was happening to me.  I felt really stupid at that point.  He chastised me no end for not doing more research on the drug.  The internet said to talk to your doctor before beginning niacin.

So now I have 119 niacin pills.  And they are gong to stay in the bottles.  I surely am not going to do that again.  It was a terrible experience.  But it did seem like a good idea at the time.

Finally - the dreaded mammogram

It's not like I don't want the mammogram.  Believe me, I certainly do.  I know what not having one for about ten years can mean.  Don't want that again.

When I was all set to make the appointment, I realized that last year (I was on yearly revisits with Dr Poison - finally), I didn't get the referral for the mammogram.  I knew that I had an appointment in the near future, so I would get the orders when I went in.  It's not like he really needed the results right then.  The doctor in charge of the mammogram place will send results.  If there is a problem, guess who will be the third to know.  Yep, me!

I have been lax about calling for appointments.  To be honest, this eye thing has me concentrating on it.  I still need to call the new orthos (since my beloved ortho died last year) to have my knees checked, but I digress.  Anyway I went today for the dreaded exam,

The tech was really good.  Since my reconstruction and reduction, there isn't just a whole lot of breast there anymore.  And I am not complaining.  The others were such they caused other problems - like backaches.  I will swear that I am pinched less now than before.  I used to dread going.  You have all heard the jokes about the mammogram feeling like someone parked a truck on your breast.  That isn't true for me anymore.

It all went well - I don't remember them doing the test on the completely reconstructed one with the insert last year, but they did this year.

So what am I concerned about?  You know me, there has to be something.  Well - it was when I thought I was all through, she went back to the non-cancer side to take another picture.  My immediate thought was "what did she see?"

I will get the results in a couple of days.  I really am hoping it is before Wednesday.  Thursday is our journey into the wilds to visit the SSB.

Confessions - at least some

Since retiring, my level of energy isn't what it used to be.  I began this time taking care of eldest granddaughter - Lady Bug, now known as soon-to-be-champion-swimmer.   She never took naps.  Then came Monkey Boy, and lastly the Littlest One.  She was a problem because Daughter didn't get her adjusted to taking a bottle in the three months she stayed home, so when I got her ...

Of course then came the cancer, and  then the knees crapped out on me.  Chemo and radiation will sap your strength - for a long time.  With aching knees it is hard to move - and getting on the floor was almost impossible.  Of course, now with new knees, my ex-ortho doc (he WOULD have to go and have a fatal heart attack on me!) told me it certainly isn't good to put that little knee-cap between something and titanium knees.  The bone tends to shatter.  So that leaves me in a more or less upright position.

So the point here?  Well - my house needs a really good cleaning.   No, more than that - it needs to be gutted.  I have slipped into somewhat of a hoarder too.  I develop silly attachments to things that are given to me, or, as in recent years those things I have salvaged from our departed loved ones.

To quickly sum it up - I have too much stuff.  So I am working diligently to divest myself of all this "stuff."

Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't make it on the show about hoarders, but I have too much stuff.  One of the things I have gotten rid of is a set of glass dishes.  You know the kind - when ladies would have lunches for their bridge club and the like.  They were really cute - little plates shaped like apples.  Cups and apple saucers (when was the last time I used a "cup?"  That's what mugs are for!) There were little apple shaped glass bowls, and something that I would only imagine were little glass coasters.  They were too small for anything else.

I finally got the nerve to get rid of them.  First, I don't play bridge.  I only know one woman who still does.  Second, all my friends are still working.  Third this set is completely fron yesterday.  Obsolete.  Does it bother me?  Yes, a little.

I guess I excuse keeping stuff because it is old - antique.  When we were last at the SSB, I went through a "high-class" resale shop.  With all the old folks up there that have died, their families are selling the stuff to him.   He has it as antiques.  And they are.

I remarked to him that much of the stuff he has - especially kitchen things like corning ware - I STILL use.  I said it was amazing to see that and toys I played with in antique stores!  He said we should just call them "retro."  OK - whatever.

Anyway, I still have no energy.  Some of that is my vitamin D deficiency.  Some might be cancer left overs.  They say you are never the same after cancer and its treatment.  Some may be age.  Some may just  be I am lazy!  Don't know - never put house keeping at the top of my list.  Did it for mom, so I have been doing it all since age 12.  Just sick of it!  But I am digging through the stuff.  Passing it along to someone else!

Some good news

When I went for the monthly eye puncturing, they did a more thorough eye exam.  I always hold my breath wondering just how much liquid is behind my retina, and, please no, my right eye hasn't gone from dry to wet macular degeneration.   I have become such a pro at thousands of drops being put into my eyes, I barely flin

I was asked how my vision was.  It seems when they test it - they always test distance vision.  Distance was a problem when I started all this.  But then, the left eye had very little clear vision.  So we do the vision chart, and I am told my vision is improving.

Doing the sewing for the grandkidlets' Easter bags, et. al.  my machine decided that it's poor needle threader wasn't going to work.  I knew I would have to thread that needle manually.  When I was trying to poke that thread into the little, bitty hole, I couldn't do it.  Luckly, years ago I had asked for a lighted magnifier that is on a long arm.  I was able to use that to thread the needle.  Still a pain with each and every thread change.  I soon figured a way to cut down on those!

So when asked, instead of my usual "I think it is worse" response, I said that the close vision was not good.  That was noted.  When the doctor came in, he said that I had progressed a great deal.  I was asked when I last had new glasses.  It was a year ago in July.

He said if my regular ophthalmologist didn't see more of a problem with the cataracts, I could look into new glasses.  It's always something isn't it?  Now it is cataract surgery I am looking at.  Well - I guess a needle stuck into my eyeball has had it's training for me! 

Back to normal

Holy Week is over, and while it is not as busy as when I was organist, it was still busy enough.  G remarked :"we go to church whenever the doors are open."  That isn't really true - just last week was really busy.  Our joint service on Good Friday was really beautiful, and the women of the church stepped up again to bring all sorts of goodies for refreshments.  We always have the fifth Sundays, this time just happened to be Easter!

I was going to go to the brand new donut shop to get donuts for Sunday.  Their opening day was Easter.  On Saturday night (about 8pm) I got to thinking that perhaps this wasn't too good of an idea.  Opening days for a business seldom go well.  So, I got to thinking of what I could make.  Cookies were out of the question - way too much work at that time of night.  Then I remembered the little dough pieces that I had left over from the prepared pie crusts that I used to make some baked apple turnovers.

In my some-time frugality, I just couldn't bring myself to throw that dough away after I used my handy-dandy crimper, and I was too lazy to re-roll it.  So, I remembered things like the Mexican treat I love - puffy pastry covered with cinnamon sugar.  So I took some sugar in the raw and a lot of cinnamon and rolled those little scaps in that mixture.  GOOD!!

That is what I did for church.  You cannot believe the compliments I got on those when I made the pie crusts completely those little thingies.  The sugar mixture would rather not stick, so there isn't much and they aren't very sweet.  A wonderful side effect is the saltiness of the pie dough!  Sweet and rather savory.  Quite a mixture

Today was my monthly stick a needle in my eyeball day.  The doctor is quite pleased with the amount of liquid behind the retina in the left eye.  I told them that I couldn't see close well anymore.  He said that if my regular opthamologist doesn't see a problem with the cataracts (ALWAYS something!), I could get a new pair of glasses soon.  We will continue with the monthly injections (sad), but things are so much better.  So needles in the eye once a month for the low price to me of $122.  I really hope we can start lengthening that time period soon.  But my eyesight is by far more important.

It looks like rain for today and tomorrow.  I will do a rain dance or whatever else is necessary!  We are slipping back into the terrible drought conditions once again.  We need rain about once a week.  We are lucky if we get it once a month.  It has been more like every two months.  We are supposed to be coastal plain - not Gobi desert!

Hope spring is blooming in your area now!  You have had enough of the cold and the snow.