Weather forecasters

Following a summer where those clowns on TV couldn't stand in front of a map of the tropics to shout total destruction by a hurricane, we now have an unusual winter. It really is, and they are really enjoying the strangeness of the situation.

Most of Swampland will not have any snow today. It will fall more to the north. Here in Swampland surburb, we may get a stray flake or two, but it won't be anything but rain. Cold, miserable rain. Our freeway overpasses and other bridges may freeze, but that in itself isn't too unusual for winter.

This silliness began last week when they saw this particular front out there on the west coast. One weather clown began with the s word. Soon they were all following suit. Now they are all saying they were the first to forecast snow! They are also busy looking at the weather history to see how this winter aligns with other winters.

It's sad to say that as soon as we get out of this weird weather we will be close to hurricane season again. I. Can. Hardly. Wait.

Peace.

CAUTION; FRAGILE, HANDLE WITH CARE

That pretty much sums up family relationships around this place. I have known that DIL is especially edgy, and I try to handle her with kid gloves as it is. Our previous history wasn't good. When she and Son were dating, she would break up and then they would go back. It was about to kill him. At this point I have to add that she was 18 at the time and he was 23. Still, it was killing him, thus it was killing me. I had finally had enough and advised him to just move on. They got back together, and DIL and I have gotten closer (I think).

SIL and DIL really do not like one another. SIL is loud, brusk, and brags too much about nothing. We all know this. It comes from his family. They never had anything. When he was in high school, they moved over 15 times. Usually the move involved leaving owing money. This all happened in a small town. He had a rough time. Anyway they mix like oil and water, but make an effort (I thought).

Saturday was Wiggle Worm's real party. It was held at the home of friends - not family. They are well off, and the party was outside. The weather wasn't really conducive for an outdoor party, but they have a pool house. I knew I wasn't going to be walking around, so I found a glider and sat. I talked with one of DIL's aunts and a couple of cousins until they moved on to something else.

When G's elderly aunts arrived, they sat near me until we really got cold, so I suggested we move into the pool house. One of the aunts had knee surgery about six months ago, and we sat together for a while comparing notes.

The party was to go from 2-5. At 4, the cake hadn't been cut nor presents opened. The adults were around the bar getting their antifreeze downed. Someone finally suggested we do the pinata for the kids and the cake thing. No move toward the presents. It was 5. G didn't feel well to begin with, so he was ready to go. Daughter and her brood were going, and the aunties were going - they had a 25 mile trip home, and don't drive at night.

The next day, Daughter called me to tell me that DIL's brother was "bad mouthing" us to the rest of the family. He was saying that we thought we were so much better than anyone else and on and on. It was like someone had punched me in the stomach. We have always been friendly with that family. G even was talking to him right after we got there. I could go on, but really am dumfounded.

Daughter posted on Facebook. DIL saw it, and she texted Daughter. Son called Daughter, and was told what happened. This was all before we had dinner here. I was really worried about dinner last night. I didn't know if there was resolution or not. Apparently there was. Things went smoothly. But it still bothers me.

I just don't know what we did to this young man. I haven't heard from Daughter yet today. I really don't know what is going on at this point. But as I said, family relationships are very, very fragile. I really thought we had a good relationship between these families. You just never know.

Peace

Free!

Well, sort of. Today is the first day in about 18 that I haven't taken any pain medication - at all. No muscle relaxers, no pain med - nothing like that.

My brain is a little clearer than it has been. The eyes are really blurry, but it's just one of those days with thickened corneas that happens.

We (Daughter, Lady Bug and Monkey Boy and I) went out for Wiggle Worm's first birthday cake. It was special. I feel really bad about being upset about it before. It was the grandparents (well, minus G), DIL's God mother, and auntie (minus uncle and Doodle Bug). It was really sweet to share that first birthday cake with that little boy.


He's not too sure about all this. "All the other times I would be "disciplined" if he made a mess, and now they want me to!!" It was sweet, and I am glad I was there.

Now I am going to sneak upstairs. I made him a shirt for tomorrow - the official party, but I don't like it. When I get an idea, I tend to hold on to that idea and make the project. Now I have thought of a better way. That's why I bought two shirts!

Peace.

Oh, my!

The words of Dr Bones when he was reading the CT scan. That was followed up with something along the lines of "I don't know which was worse, the knee or the back." Great.

They he went on to say his goal is to make the knee hurt worst than the back. Well, thanks Doc! I love you too. His theory is that because the nerves are so impinged, the pain signal from the knee isn't getting through, so I am sitting here in bliss because the pain signal is blocked.

He has referred me to the Pain Management people. They (and he) do not believe in back surgery. I knew I loved him. So the plan is that I will see them, they will numb the back and give me four epidural shots.

Between you and me, I don't think the numbing of the back will do squat for what is coming! But I have to look for what will come. He is thinking 90% improvement. I would like to think 100%, but that is the school teacher coming out in me - shoot for the best.

So if I haven't heard from them by late morning tomorrow, I will call. Then the appointment will be made for sometime next week. Oh, please let there be relief. I could feel the pain shooting down from the lumbar region through my right buttocks heading for the leg. The left has twinges, but that right is ready to give me hell.

If I don't have considerable relief from this nerve impingement, I will not have the right knee done. I can feel now that a good deal of the pains I have felt are from the back problem. We'll see what each day brings.

Peace

Still going on

I tried to cut back on the muscle relaxers and pain pills yesterday. That wasn't such a good idea, so I am taking what seems to be the lowest amount I need. It still makes my brain fuzzy, and thoughts are so hard to form - and remember! But anyway!

One thing I wanted to share was Monkey Boy's comment about the scar on my knee. It is about 18 inches long, and I finally took most of the bandages off Sunday. Monkey Boy was sitting on the floor, and when he looked over he said "Grandma, that's a bad cut you've got there!" From the mouths of kids . . .

One of the effects of these pills is to make me a little more emotional. I knew it would happen, but I am so tired of being here. I don't think it would be so bad if I could go upstairs. Were it not for the pills, I think I could. But lightheaded and stairs don't mix well.

Another thing that is causing me a bit of a problem is Wiggle Worm. His birthday party (total blow out) is Saturday. His real birthday is tomorrow. They (parents) have decided that they will have cake tomorrow about 6:15-6:30.

This is a tough time for us down here in what DIL considers close to the "hood." G has been getting off at 4:30 to come home to care for me. He is behind at work, and plans to stay a little later for the rest of the week. Even so, we all down here (us and Daughter's family) don't eat until late.

We don't have a "rush hour." We have "rush hours." The time they have chosen are right in the middle of this time. It will be a bear to get to them. But if we don't. All hell will break loose - at least our ears will be burning like I don't know what.

It's really sad, but we don't know Wiggle Worm. We are the ones who come in last. After all DIL's family has been seen, and they do all the things they want with them - we are given a crumb of time.

With that last statement - it is time to stop! I don't know what/who is speaking here. I need to find out before this goes on. I may need to get these feelings buried again. Soon.

Peace

More drama!

After leaving Dr Bone's office, I made the appointment for the CT scan for Saturday. Happy, happy times. I thought I would be well on my way to healing by Wednesday and the world was bright!

Saturday we arrived for the scan. They had me for an MRI. The receptionist was going to argue until I whipped out my copy of the orders. She then looked at her second page, which was my orders. There it was - CT scan. The problem - no technician to do that scan.

So we made the appointment for Monday. I already had an appointment with Dr Heart ( and I still can't figure out why), but I thought he wasn't that important. The scan was for 9am and the cardio was 10:15. Easy. I hope.

The dawn comes yesterday, and I haul myself out of bed. We eat a quick breakfast and head over the the center. We are there early, and there are just a bare sprinkling of other patients. I complete some forms and pay (first things first, you know). I go over to sit, and I am there for only about 5 minutes before I am called back.

I change clothes, fight with the lock on the locker, and then find they are waiting for me. I go to the room, hop on the table, get situated, and bam, I'm done! It is 8:45.

So we head over to Dr Heart. I get in - on time, but that meant a 30 minute wait anyway. I could tell he wasn't sure why I was there either, but that's ok. We were home by 11, amd G was on his way to work.

That meant I could take a nap. Which I did - until 3. I don't know why I slept so much, but I did.

I was amazed how well things clicked yesterday. Saturday, I was really upset with the whole thing. Now, hopefully, I will hear from Dr Bones today, and I will be on the way to no pain.

With no pain that means I will have my brain back. This fog is getting old. I don't know how the addicts do it. My brain just gives me little starts and stops. I hate it!

Peace

Same, same

I am so tired of being held hostage in my house. It wouldn't be so bad, but I am really afraid to venture upstairs. It's not going up that scares me, although right at the top there isn't anything to hold on to. That is scary.

It's coming down. When the sciatic nerve really kicks in, my left leg feels so weak. I just don't trust it. I have the walker close by. It wouldn't do stairs well. I can picture it now - me and the walker, at the bottom of the stairs, in one mangled mess!

Taking muscle relaxers and pain pills make me want to sleep - sleep - sleep. The weather doesn't help. It is nasty, cold and wet, but it isn't too cold. We are lucky in that. It could be so much worse. But put me on the couch in a blanket, and the temperatures are just perfect! Then before I know it, I'm asleep.

I'm anxious for the CAT tomorrow. I don't know where we go from there. I wish they hadn't been so booked up and we could have gotten in on Wednesday.

At least the pain in minimal because I haven't done any of the PT exercises. I talked to SIL last night and jokingly accused her of getting even with me for not having any pain. I also emailed G's aunt. I didn't want his uncle putting more pressure on her. He thinks she wasn't getting well soon enough.

So I'm off to rummage for something for lunch. I really don't know what I want. Then another dose of pills. And then ... yep, sleep - I'm sure.

Have a great weekend. For those in the snow and cold, I hope that stops soon.

Peace.

New development

This isn't exactly new, I have been having back problems for many, many years. I didn't mention this to Dr Bones because no other ortho really listened.

So yesterday was the day for my follow up visit. They took me back to take an x-ray. I told them the knee was great, but my back - oh my back. Dr Bones ordered a lumbar film too.

They got me into the room, and G and I sat for a bit. (the story about G is another one for later) It wasn't but a minute before Dr Bones blew into the exam room followed by his nurse (who is his right hand! She amazes me.) He looked at the x-ray of my back and said "oh, my!" Not good.

Nurse V began cutting the staples. Now that was an experience. It is what I shall dread about knee number two - if we can get this back under control. So, here they go - both talking and doing their thing. She is cutting, he talking about my back. I was about to just faint away!

To sum it up - I will have a CAT scan on my back. We had hoped for today, but they can't do it until Saturday. That's good. No one has to take time off. Then I will have some sort of injection in the nerve at either L5 or L6. I don't know if anyone ever heard me say that it is hurting on both sides, just the left is worse.

He said fixing the knee irritated the nerve more, and that's my problem. So until further medical action, it's pain pills and muscle relaxers for me! Being medicated like that coupled with this cold, wet weather, I sleep a lot. Thanks for all the comments and wishes. Means a lot.

Peace.

I called bone doctor's office yesterday morning. At least, I thought I did. My back and leg were hurting so much that I took two pain pills yesterday morning. I was concerned about taking more PT. I didn't think the session should cause this much pain.

When TJ the PT (I just had to do that), got here, I told him what was going on. There was only one exercise I cut back on. After PT I did feel pretty good, but that was a situation that didn't last long.

About 6:30, bone nurse called - finally. She said to not do some of the exercises that involved the hip, and come in tomorrow, as is scheduled. I think more is going to added to PT. I think TJ the PT thinks so too. He said I should call him when I get home, and then he will come for theapy.

I really wish my daughter would take a good long look at what I am going through. She is so much like me. If I hadn't been bull-headed when I was young, I don't think I would be in the shape I'm in. I moved furniture without help - so does she. Things that would be better waiting for help, she (and me in my day) just goes ahead and does whatever.

My mind is half fog right now. The single pain pill I took a while ago is kicking in.

Peace.

Weekend pains

I thought, hoped, prayed, that my reaction to physical therapy would be a one time offer. I suffered through Friday, and Saturday wasn't bad at all. By Sunday evening, I was really suffering again.

The pain really does originate in the back, but the real pain is in the shin area. That muscle cramps terribly. And so it was doing Sunday afternoon. By Sunday night it was terrible again.

This morning when I opened my eyes, things were not bad. I thought it was over. Nope. It got worse and worse. I ended up taking two pain pills. In that fog, I called the doctor's office - come to think of it they haven't called back.

I spent the day sleeping - and another PT session. So far so good. We'll see what happens.

Today was a really nice day. Tomorrow, it will be the pits. There is talk about snow again. Wait, wait!! We live in the SOUTH!! That means no snow!

I feel sorry for those who are trapped in such snows. I know you are tired of it. We can only hope for some moderation of the weather soon.

LB got into a bit of trouble at school last week. I'll share it tomorrow. I think the couch is calling me for another nap!

Peace

The great equilizer

Physical therapy. Yes, that brings us back down to reality. I had my first serious PT session today.

TJ came to the house. We started with ankle flexes. OK! Can do those all day. But then things got more serious - a lot more serious.

Earlier in the day, I got an email from SIL. She was glad that I had weathered the surgery so well. She said her first two days were sheer hell, and probably even a half working epidural had helped. I'm sure it must have.

In the last of her email was to be nice to the physical therapist. Now I understand.

I am supposed to do those *&^$^&&(, I mean rehabilitating, exercises three times a day. Hummmm, I really don't think so. This afternoon I noticed that I was leaking a little more, and it was rather fresh. I wonder what those staples look like.


Ah, the might has been brought to her (wait for it) knees.

Peace.

It hurt

I never had an epidural - ever. With my first child, the OB-GYN knocked me out when the time came. This was 36 years ago, and I guess he was a little "old school" for even that time. But it was OK. G wasn't allowed in the delivery room - as if he would go!

So when I was getting one for this surgery, I didn't know what to expect. I remember when Daughter was giving birth to Lady Bug they wouldn't give her one until she got to a 4 or 5. She was progressing slowly. She had been hospitalized the night before with the cervical softener which didn't seem to be doing it's job.

She was progressing slowly the entire next day. About 5:30 pm she said she had to go to the bathroom. I looked at the nurses like they had three heads when they said she could get up and go. What? I know the birth procedure in the hospitals had changed, but ... When she got into bed, she requested they check her again.

What a flurry of activity. They said she could have the epidural, and the doctor would be there immediately to give it to her. They didn't request we leave the room - which happened with both the other two and mine even. She was like a wilted daisy. Son in law was there to hold her still, and she just laid on him. As soon as the medicine went in, she sat up like a puppet on a string. She was "bright-eyed and bushy tailed!"

Well, I was with her on at least one of the next two, but I never saw her flinch with the insertion of the needle or the drug. That wasn't the way it was for me. IT HURT. When the medicine went in the sensation down me left leg was like the device used in old science fiction movies that consisted of the two poles with the static electricity running up them at intervals.

I was really surprised with that epidural. In addition to me not knowing it would hurt, it came loose on the second day. I would push my button, and my back would get wet. The nurses checked it, and all looked well. The pain doc on call came over after things calmed down in the birthing center. It looked ok.

The next day, when it was scheduled to come out, my bed was soaked. It is our (nurses, doctors, me) conclusion that I didn't have the epidural stopping the pain properly. Wow. I will tell you this, there was no difference between the pain of day one and day two.

I got my hand slapped!

Yesterday I was sitting here with the home health nurse finishing up our certification when the phone rang. It was Dr Bone's nurse. She asked me if I had "the machine" and I smartly replied that I did not - I didn't think I needed it. She told me that I certainly did need it, and she was going to call the company to get it delivered to me. So.

Poor Andre. I had told him I didn't need it earlier in the day, and when he called about delivering it, I apologized - profusely. He was true to his word, he was here about 6:45. In comes this monster. He looks at me reclining on my antique sofa and said he didn't think it would fit. I didn't even, so we headed back to the bedroom.

The worst thing about this whole ordeal is that after having breast cancer and it's associated treatments three years ago left me completely wiped out during that time, and then knees got really bad about the same time. Moving was a pain (sorry for the pun). My house is the pits. I had to let a stranger into the bedroom. I was just so humiliated.

Anyway back to the saga of "the machine." He set it up on the bed, and I could see that it was every bit as heavy as the one in the hospital. All the nurses complained about the weight. We got is all set up, I got attached to the thing, and we ran it for a bit making sure it worked. This thing is to passively move my leg - pulling the knee up to the chest while I am laying there. I should use it 6-8 hours a day (!?!??).

At bedtime, there was the behemoth. Still there. I don't know why G didn't move it when he tested its weight earlier. So, bull headed German I am, I moved that rascal. Just about killed me too, but I'll never admit it!

I just don't know how I am supposed to use this thing. I cannot put myself in it. According to nurse Valarie, it is to keep blood clots from forming. I think I better get really good at wiggling my toes a lot.

Right now the only fear about knee number 2's replacement is my butt. The second day after surgery, I was so sore. I couldn't move without so much pain - in my butt muscles. It got worse day 3. They still hurt. I remember this is part of what happens to me in the hospital. I don't know why. It doesn't seem to happen to others. Right now I am sitting on a pillow because these chairs simply don't have enough padding, and mine, while being ample, is too sore to sit on it.

In fact, I just took a pain pill, and the effects are being felt! I better close or this little post will be illegible - even with spell check, et al.

Peace

Home again, gigidy gig

It took everything and then some to get me out. The doctor finally came by to make his observation. It seems that the norm is to be released to a rehab hospital. That means at least one and more like two weeks. No. Nope. I don't want one more day in a hospital. And here it is 1:40 and I am still in my pjs. That wouldn't happen in a rehab hospital as I was told. We would all be up and out of the rooms. Nope.

I do have home health coming to do PT three times a week. She is going to be here in a minute.

The doctor was amazed at my progress. I thought the PT people in the hospital were thinking I wasn't walking like I should, but he said I was blowing the top out of that. I am doing well. My hindrance it really the right knee. It still hurts like crazy. I have to admit, I have surprised myself. I didn't realize just how bad I was before.

Fear does that though. The unknown kept me afraid. I was so afraid of the pain. But I knew I couldn't go on the way it was. I was in such pain. My spirits are soaring now.

Thanks for all the well wishes and prayers. They helped!

Peace

Live from the hospital

Going to be brief Still in hospital, just got computer last night. Hopefully going home today, but there is nasty talk about a rehab hospital. Had some ups and downs. My only regret is that I waited so long. It wasn't bad at all.

More to come.

Love and peace

It's almost time

Here I am less than 24 hours away from the surgery. This has been hanging over my head for so long now. I can't believe it is almost here. My apprehension is high - red level. G doesn't want to talk about it anymore. He just doesn't even listen. I guess I really can't blame him. Men want to solve things whereas women want to talk about them in a effort to sole them.

I just wish they would give me an example (like the faces they use) to quantify pain. How much worse is it than what I experience now? But then pain is an individual thing. Eeryong tells me that I have already endured so much that I can get through this one.

Tonight I have to shower with an antibacterial soap, and then get up tomorrow and do it again. Some of you probably don't share this point of view, and some may think this is terrible, but there is very little in this world that I dislike more than a morning shower. Texas weather is being Texas weather, so after this lovely warm period we have had, it will be chilly again. And I have to put my body in a shower. Uck.

So this will be my last post for a while. I wanted to take Gertie here with me to the hospital, but first, as nice as this place is, I don't want her tempted to go home with someone else, and second, I got to thinking about setting her up: plugging her in, setting it up, etc. So she will be waiting here for me to teturn.

What happens on my return which will be Saturday at the earliest, I don't know. But I will see you later on down the road.

Peace.

I finally did it

After sewing for almost 50 years, I finally ran the needle through my finger. I couldn't believe I did it! I have come close before. I have had my finger rapped heartily by the side of the needle holder (is there a name for that thingie?), but I never had the needle penetrate the flesh.

Yesterday I was trying to get Wiggle Worm's birthday shirt done. I know the party is February 20, but I have this thing that I have lamented hanging over my head. I don't know when I can return to the land of fun since I don't know when I can climb stairs.

I was trying to hoop a two year old's shirt on an 8 inch by 8 inch hoop. This is something akin to trying to put a gallon of liquid into a pint container. The shirt fits - but there then is the little problem of getting the back out of the way. Funny - it needs to be open so WW can put it on. Strange, isn't it.

So I had this mass of shirt between the hoop and where it has to join the arm of the machine. Not a pretty picture. As I began embroidering his name, I could see that the shirt was not being held tightly. So that meant fingers were perilously close to that needle.

To make matters worse, the thread decided to act up. It would slip off the cone to wrap tightly around the thread holder spool. That made the stitches very tight, and the thread broke - repeatedly. Fixed that. I remembered someone sharing a hint of putting the thread in a jar. Well, not having a jar, I used one of our Floozie Koozies. Worked like a charm - most of the time.

By this time, the hoop had become un-hooped. I pushed and pushed and got it secured again. The design was a little off, but not bad. I was reaching in to try to straighten something when I felt the hit, then the needle piercing the flesh. I was amazed that I had been so stupid.

I quickly stopped the machine. I peered at the now throbbing finger. Perhaps I was wrong. Perhaps the needle didn't go through! No blood. Yipee! But then . . . the blood came. It was then I remembered I wanted to stash some bandaids up there. I usually cut a finger with the scissors if I hurt myself. Had I done that little chore. Well you know that answer.

I had to stop the bleeding. I looked around, forgetting that I did have tissue right there. The only thing I saw was the reminants of LB's pink jersey pj top. So I took that strip to try to wrap around the finger tip. The wound was in such a place that I couldn't get good pressure on it, and it wouldn't stay tight.

I looked around for something to use to get the pressure tight. Nothing. I searched all around me, and finally I saw the blue painter's tape. So I wrapped that bleeding finger in blue painter's tape. I got the pressure to hold on the tip. It still took a while to stop the bleeding, and I went back to fighting that shirt.

All in all, it came out OK. It will do. I have to cut jump threads and so on, but it won't take long.

What have I learned from this? Well, I know that I expect too much from this machine. I keep thinking it will do what a professional machine will do. They will hoop something like this - successfully. Will I do this again? You know that answer!

Peace.

I finally succumbed

Yesterday I had to get the shirt I want to embroidery for Wiggle Worm's first birthday party. As we all know (Yawn), I won't be able to do it after Wednesday. So I loaded up to head to the Store with the Bull's eye.

When I got there, I made the decision that I no longer needed to plod through the store, hurting with very step. So I climbed aboard a motorized cart. I was intimidated at first. I carefully read the directions. I had a steady green light, so I figured I was good to go.

The very first thing that happened was the alarm on the door went off. For Pete's sake, what was this? No one seemed to be worried about it, so off I went.

My first stop was the handbags. A few weeks ago, I broke the handle on my favorite purse, and got one out that I hated. Now this is rather comical because - I make purses. But I wanted a good pouch purse. The first ones I saw were huge. Now I like a big purse, but these were like brief cases. I finally saw one I liked and puttered off.

My next stop was the children's area. I don't know why the stores have to put all their racks so close together. I think I ran over a couple of those racks. I did find two shirts. Now I just have to see which one will work best. I'll do something on the other one and give it to him too.

I decided to go back to look for some night gowns. I have shortie pj's, and I don't think they will do for the hospital. I don't think they will be good with that knee. The intimate area was more crowded than the child area. What in the world? And they didn't have a single gown. Drat!

Then I thought I would cut a stop out of my trip. I needed vacuum seal bags to complete the putting up of the sausage. I headed off to housewares, but the cart was really slower. I checked my green light - it was blinking.

I felt like I was on a long, winding deserted road with no gasoline in the tank. I decided to head to checkout. Maneuvering check out was daunting. There is no wiggle room. So I took the easy access checkout - which wasn't the fastest.

Having paid for my two shirts and purse, I was ready to flee the place. After all, I had rearranged parts of the store! Wouldn't you know, the light was steady green now. It reminded me of the time I rode horses. They would love to "barn rat." That was what this cart was doing, I'll swear. It knew
we were close to the place where it could be left and plugged in again, like the horse looking for its sweet feed.

Now I was facd with the doors and the alarm. Surerly it wouldn't. Surely I could get out. Not on your life. It sounded off as though I was stealing the whole store. And I just rolled on. The woman in front looked at me as though she was wondering how I could shop lift when I couldn't walk. I simply said "it must be this thing - it did it on the way in!"

I parked the buggy and limped to the car. When I got to the grocery (still had to get those blasted bags), I decided I had enough of motoriized shopping!

Will I do it again. Maybe. It was nice not to hurt, but those things are not for small spaces.

Peace.

Hoarder

I will swear I have some tendencies that lean toward hoarding. I look around as I sit here, and things are especially cluttered now. Getting things stowed where they belong is not an easy thing. I really feel it because I have five days to get it stowed. After that I will have a physical therapist coming here to put me through my paces. Oh, my!

I was reading another blog about someone having things from her deceased relatives. That spurred my memory of all the things I have had to let go. I did manage to get some things from my aunt and uncle - who were like second parents to me, but I had a vivid memory of some of the things in their house I had to leave. It was the same with my dad. I had to leave so much, at all the houses where he lived. Let me explain that statement. He kept the house I grew up in when he married V. He rented it out, bu he had a huge storeroom. After he and V married, he built another storeroom. It had a lot of his tools in it. I had to leave them. And of course the lake property. There was a lot - including antiques that I had to leave. It does make me sad.

But then I look around. Now I have stuff. To paraphrase George Carlin, we have our houses to keep our stuff. We then get more stuff so we need a bigger house. When we move in here, I was amazed at our storage. For years, we had unused cabinets. No more. Well, some that could be organized better would have some space.

We have been here 34 years. Stuff happens! It doesn't help that I was a science teacher. We could use all sorts of items with our experiments. A lot of teachers know that as soon as you throw something away, you could use it in the classroom. I can't tell you how many times that happened.

Now I am a crafter. Guess what! Same things. Most of it is stashed neatly away, but I am in the middle of stashing some of it. I looked at pictures of another sewer/crafter yesterday. It was her basement. I was amazed at the fact she posted them. But I think this is a problem with crafters. That's why dear Martha is always highlighting organization. We are all looking to be more organized (but she is ridiculous - I think she only has items that will fit - doesn't matter if she needs other tools).

I don't think I fit into the hoarder role, but then neither do they. I have manageable stuff, I just need to be able to manage it physically - my physically, not house storage physically.

Wish me luck.

Peace.

Lady Bug, dear Lady Bug

It is difficult to think that this is her last year in single digits. She is growing up so fast, but with her growing so fast, it gives me an idea of who she will be! I look for her to do great things.

When Christmas was coming, she heard about the Zhu-zhu pets. I heard about them too, and knew I wanted to give her at least one. By the time I heard about them here in my cave, it was too late. They were the hit of the season.

I made the decision that by her birthday, the hub-bub would be over, and I could find some. As fate would have it, Daughter found them at a drug store chain that is one of her stores. She was able to get FOUR of them! We decided that LB had plenty for Christmas, and we would stick to the original plan. They woud be for her birthday.

In the mean time, one of the sites I visit for machine embroidery had also discovered the Zhu-Zhus. She came up with a pattern for the accessories for the little critters. It wasn't ready for release around Christmas. She did have a pattern for a Santa suit and elves. Well, that wouldn't do. Lb's birthday is January 16.

I kept checking for those accessories. I need to email her that her site isn't too user friendly - put that on my list of to do! I never found them. They included a sleeping bag, blanket and carrier. I looked and looked. Nothing.

Then it appeared they were available. Coudn't find them. Last night, after much weeping and gnashing of teeth, I won. I downloaded the patterns. Great - I will be out of commission after next week. The machine will be upstairs. I can't do stairs. Well - they will be done.

LB got to open her presents a day early. She was delighted with everything, but she also was thrilled with those pets. She took them with her when parents went to the gym. When they were getting ready to leave, LB was cloudy! Her beloved pets didn't work anymore. Her mom was heart broken. What a birthday present. One day and zap!

They took the things home and it appears they shouldn't be operated on carpet. So Daughter went aobut cleaning all the fuzz out. Still dead. Her hopes were dashed. Then she had the inspiration to check the batteries. Now Daughter is not the handy type. I was so proud of her. She replaced the batteries and viola they worked again!

So disaster was averted. Things are looking bright. The site is going to put up a pattern for a ballerina outfit for the pets next week. I just hope they continue to work until I can get everything made!!

Peace.

What a day!

This was one full day! I went to the hospital to pre-register. I was a little shocked when I was to pay them my portion of the bill - today. We're talking like $2000. It was a surprise, to say the least.

I was to be there at 11. I was, but appointments don't mean much apparently. I got to wait for a while. After a poke for blood typing (thankfully my blood work was done last week) an EKG, and filling out p a p e r s!!! And more papers. We finally finished at 1.

I went to the courtyard there in the hospital. It seems more like a mall in that area. Anyway, I went to the place with food. It is more than a snack bar and less that a restaurant. I had a pretty good chef's salad. I just wish they would take a little more time to get the ribs out of the romaine lettuce!!

Then I was off to the cardio doc for a 1:45 appointment. That late means HE is running late. I though they were going to do another EKG. I am so glad the technician gave me a (shhhh) copy. She wasn't suppposed to, but she did. He is concerned with the blood sugar. So am I. Even more reason for a diet - or change of living.

Then I went to get my glasses that came in - early. They are different. I always have to get used to new progressive lenses. I haven't hit the sweet spot for the computer yet. Distance is great. We'll see about the reading part after a bit.

Now it's off to packing away breakfast sausage. G was emphatic that we take the venison and pork to the SSB. Our friend and neighbor had a real kick-a** grinder. He can grind the sausage in less than 15 when with our little grinder it would take hald a day. Anyway, I have over 50 pounds out there.

In keeping with usual Texas weather, it is HOT today. That means the ice will probably be melted. I just LOVE things being dumped on me. Now I know why he keeps working. So I can go to the bank (which he requested today), pack sausage, keep stamps in the house (he used them all last night), and all the little drudgery in life.

Anyway . . .

Peace.

Hi ho, hi ho, it's off to

Yeah, it's time again. I tried tom suggest we go next weekend since Lady Bug's birthday is TOMORROW! We have missed her birthday for the last three years at least. G says it's because it is doe and spike season, but I heard him telling one of our SSB neighbors last night we wouldn't shoot a doe anyway because he was sure one he shot before was pregnant. As for spikes, we haven't seen too many this year. I think neighbor and his wife has done a good job weeding them out.

We will be going to community club, which I normally would love. The problem here is that there is going to be rain. Our roads are not paved. The county, in trying to make the roads better, added dirt on top of the rock. I know their goal was to smooth out the rocks. Problem: the dirt turns to mud which is really sort of deep. It is deep enough that when we decided to get rid of the troop carrier (big F250 4X4) we decided that we really needed to get a junior troop carrier. Even with the 4x4, navigating that road is scary. There is much slipping and sliding about.

So we will travel it to get to the house. We will settle the kids (Simone and Shadow); I will put the bought day old cake on a plate (probably not fooling anyone); and head back down the road. I hope we can find the old ruts. Then after dinner, the meeting, and bingo (which turns out to be quite fun - those ranchers get to be cut-throat about the prizes - like gas treatment for cars) we will return via that road again.

At least our little area is getting a little built up. There are the Polish outsiders (whom we love), G's sister, his brother and his wife, and a couple of other cousins. (Marti - they are in the branches, not twigs) If we get stuck, there will be others along.

I know I will have limited internet. I have it at the whim of ATT. Sometimes I have a great signal, sometimes not so much.

Have a great weekend. See you Tuesday for sure.

Peace.

Money Pit

Not really, but it almost seems that way.

Our investment property just got new window blinds through out the house. It is now getting a new water heater. Lovely.

It may have also found a tenant. The plumber loves this house. He really wants to buy it, but is thinking perhaps lease for a year then buy. Of course, this is all dependent on wife!!

If we were to sell, we would make a really nice profit. Even with everything we have done, the amount we have invested is less than market value.

The only thing left is for the electrician to get here to replace the breaker panel and put in ground fault outlets in the bathrooms.

The maid service I hired was terrible. They lost out on my having hired them long term for my house. I hate, absolutely hate, stainless steel sinks. I know they can look really nasty most of the time, but I also know they can look pretty good. When the service left here, the sink looks horrible. The windows I asked to be washed are not clean. I think they ruined the solar film on the windows in the living room. Well - they won't be back.

I think the plumber is about finished. Good. The heat is on, but set at 50 degrees. I am freezing here sitting on a brick hearth. I need to get warm after this next little bundle I drop.

Peace.

YEA!!

Very quick note because I have a plumber coming to the other house. The letter came today. The mammogram is normal!!!

Yea! Bring on that new knee.

So spoiled!!

This is Shadow now. He is only a bit spoiled, as you can see. When he was a little baby, this was easy to do, but now . . . He thinks it is just normal for me to hold him while I surf. The problem is that he now hangs off both ends of the arm - just a bit!

As for the soap box stands from the past few days, I refused to read the paper this morning before I posted. I doubt there is anything new because the vote at the school board meeting won't happen until tomorrow night. So I am at a low simmer.

It really amazes me that Texas teachers let things like this happen to them. I have never been part of a more passive group in my life. Look where that character trait has gotten those still in service today. They are viewed as less than valuable workers. But. I. Will. Let. This. Drop. (at least for now as I have said enough)

Yesterday I was actually out of the house! I had my semi-annual blood test for the heart doc. Then I treated myself to breakfast out since the blood work was fasting. From there I went to the office supply to get a calendar to fit my day runner. This year looks like one where I will be tied to it again with all the doctors appointments.

I went to get an eye exam after that. I love my eye (real) doctor, but her prescription for glasses was wayyyyyy off. I have vision insurance that I used for that script for new glasses. Well, I can't see out of them. So I went to just a vision check doc. What an exam. She was great, and the prescription is way different.

One of the local optical places is having a sale. Two frames for the price of one, and two sets of lenses for the price of one. Great. Yes, please, but wait - not so fast. I wear the varilux (that spelling beats me!) progressive. Guess which ones are not on sale. So the two pairs of glasses would be over $450. I came home and mentioned it to G. He didn't think that was so bad, so I guess I will be out and about again.

My life is just so exciting.

Peace.

More insanity

Well, the newspaper had another article about the ridiculous idea to use student test scores to fire teachers. The school board is pretty much in favor of this. I'm not going to hide anything about this now because, as far as I'm concerned, this school district is making an absolute farce of test scores.

We are talking about Houston Independent School District. They have a new superintendent who believes this will help improve test scores. This thing will be voted on Thursday. It is part of something that is called the teacher's "value added score." They are "not out to get people" said the new superintendent. The trustees said they "do not intend to oust teachers based on one year of poor scores."

This is the same school district that will pay those teachers who have students who score well on the test. Now I know some of you were/are teachers. You know as well as I, not all classes are the same. Clustering of poor and good students happens. If you were lucky enough to get high achievers - well you would be getting a nice bonus. If not, well under this new policy, your neck is on the line. I am fully aware there are teachers who need to be weeded out. I taught with a bunch of them, but somehow they always escaped the hatchet. But that hatchet would swing far and wide, hitting some really good teachers instead of the chaff.

This little score is only for elementary and middle schools. High school teachers are not involved. If the score can be determined for elementary and middle, then why not high school. I have been in both situations. What is the difference? Am I the only stupid one here??

One trustee, Diana Davila, said the policy changes will help ensure quality teaching and schools throughout HISD. How?? The make-up of the schools is very different. The students are different. And based on Sunday's article, so are the administrators.

Ms Davila went on to say that "as a parent that has kids in HISD it shouldn't matter where I send my child to school. Every school should be at the same level." In a perfect world, absolutely. But obviously we are not in a perfect world. If all schools are at the same level, why does HISD have magnet schools?

Chasing these test scores has done more to disrupt teaching, learning, and teacher morale than anything in the last century here in Texas. There is more "teaching the test" going on than any other form of teaching. That happened when they tied the administrator's score to the test. I spend as much time teaching reading and math as I did teaching Life Science. I am curious how that works now that science is a tested area. That may explain why the science scores are low.

I promise I will get off my soap box. There is more to my life than this ridiculous situation that really does not have any effect on me at all. I don't live in that district. My grandchildren do not attend school in that district. I just have compassion for the classroom teacher. The teacher is expected to be everything to everybody. It just can't happen. Teachers are human - wonderful, dedicated humans. Who else would put up with all the s**t that is going on in schools today for the pittance they get paid?

Peace.

I'm appalled! I'm furious!

Excuse me a minute. I have to position my soap box here. Ok, let's go.

Here is Texas, as in other states, we have testing of the school kidlets to determine their progress during the school year. It is a trying time for all concerned - that is except for some of the kids.

We have several school districts here in Swampland. One takes the name of Swampland, and I will refer to it as SISD(meaning Stupid Independent School District). It is not the district from which I retired. That one will be referred to as CISD (Corrupt Independent School District).

In yesterday's paper, the paper had an occasional feature story they run. It is about SISD's attempt to increase test scores by giving "good" teachers an additional $20,000 to transfer to schools that are labeled as non performing. Let me assure you, $20,000 is A LOT of money to a teacher. Were it my daughter's salary, not so much. It would have been about 1/3 more of my salary at the time I retired with 29 years experience. What I'm saying is even now it means a lot.

The newspaper followed two teachers that transferred to a middle school in particular. They were having problems getting their students to perform. One was an English teacher and the other was English as a second language (ESL). Both had been very successful. That means their principals liked them, and their already high performing students blew the top out of the test.

So now dawns the day in the low school. The English teacher had been cursed to her face. She found that in that school, she could not send an unruly student to the office. She had to write a referral, and the office would get the kidlet when "they knew how to handle him." What?!?!?!? The principal let the newspaper QUOTE her on that. This is the exact reason I retired at 29 years instead of 30. OK Mrs. X, you keep that child in your class and just flush the other 29 children down the toilet because we need to know how to handle that child."

Let me tell you because I know - it doesn't take the kids long to realize what is going on here, and they take full advantage of the situation. Soon almost the entire school is in turmoil because they know that nothing will be done to a disruptive student, and when the acting out begins, learning ends. And the test scores are low because . . .

With the advent of the new semester, the administrator has opened "satellite offices." I don't know exactly how these work, but it has got to be better than keeping the little offender in the classroom. But then, SISD is known for sending these kids right back to the teacher. That happened earlier when a student assaulted the teacher, and after whatever little slap on the hand he got, he was sent back to that teacher's class. I wonder if they asked the teacher what the teacher did to provoke that child.

The ESL teacher was having problems with his students who spoke about ten different languages. I kid you not! He would get occasional, non scheduled help. He had some discipline problems too, but it came out later that this wonderful principal finally decided this second semester to "shuffle staffing" to help balance out his overcrowded class. And we are not performing on tests because . . .

So on today's paper - "Teachers could be fired over scores." Wait. Just. A. Minute. A teacher could be fired because of the student's non-performance. It is not just the teacher. I am fully aware that there are a lot of teachers who should be weeded out, but this is not the way.

After the two examples I just gave - the administrators can certainly be at fault. If the school environment is not conducive to learning, it is just not going to happen. With just one discipline problem, learning stops for the other students. Overcrowding means kids can easily slip through the cracks. You just can't give them the attention they need. You probably don't really even know that child well enough to know his learning style.

Blame for non-performance can be teacher, yes, but we need to be also looking at the administrator, parents, and (gasp) student. All are equally important.

Thank you for your time. Now I will put my soap box back in the closet - until the next time.

Peace.

Improving!

The temperature is improving - finally. I know we sound like real wimps down here, but we just doin't build our houses for several days of below freezing temperatures. We have been lucky in that we got all the pipes insulated and nothing broke. That's great.

My tropical and subtropical plants look like cooked spinach now. I think they will come back, but my flower beds are really pathetic right now. My 30+ year old split leaf philodendrons that were four feet tall not are a pathetic glob of goo. I haven't had the nerve to venture out back to the deck yet. I think this will be a year to replant things.

We finally have sunlight streaming through our windows. Partially because there IS sunlight, and partially because I don't have the blinds closed and the drapes pulled tight to try to keep the cold out and the warm in. There is a good five degree temperature difference between the living areas and the bedrooms. This happens in summer too, but we can crank up the fans to get the air moving. With the cold, we have to have a fire going and all the north rooms closed off. It still is cooler in the living areas, but the fire makes it seem warmer. Perhaps I should just not watch programs on cable and turn to "Yule Log" in the on-demand section. It would be easier than tending a fire.

Even my spirits are somewhat lifted. I have been puttering to de-clutter. That also energizes me somewhat. I do love a clean house, but so often I just feel overwhelmed. If I just had a little help . . . (from someone who lives here) But I am slowly getting it together. My deadline is the 26th. I work better under pressure!

Friday I went for the spot compression mammogram. I know the doctor looked at it then because the technician took the thing (not a film because it is all digital now) for him to be sure that they got the proper view. In my way of thinking, he could have told me good or bad right then. Hopefully I will know something by Tuesday. Perhaps there won't be a knee replacement on the 27th. Or then, perhaps the breast surgeon can just scrub in with the Ortho doc and do it all at once.

Hope you are warm and comfortable. Hope you didn't have pipes break or a power outage to make you huddle in the dark.

Peace.

I am such a baby!

Ummm - would you mind bringing the cheese and those crackers over here to go with the whine? Yep - here I go again.

I was talking to Daughter yesterday. She was bemoaning the fact that she didn't see how SIL was going to be able to take care of the three kidlets while she was out of town for a week. I thought she was going to get around to me helping out, and I was going to do it, but tell her she manages when he is gone.

So I asked when she was going to be gone. It is the same week as my knee surgery. Now I am a big girl; perfectly capable of taking care of myself - until I have to go to a hospital. I get really lonely in the hospital. G doesn't do hospitals. I guess it comes from working in one for 25+ years. He will dutifully come by to check on me, then after about 15 minutes he is gone - like a ghost. He uses the excuse that he has to come to tend to Simone. I know there is truth in that, but . . .

Everyone asks if he is going to take some time off after I get home. I just chuckle. Nope. He is going to (gasp) modify his hour though. He will go in a little later so he can help with my breakfast and set up lunch. That means I will have to eat at dark thirty and have a cold lunch. Neither is my life style. In the evenings, he will leave early so he can fix dinner and do the dishes. Oh my, that means his skewed menus. He did that when he retired and worked part time, and I was still teaching full time.

I am upset about Daughter being gone because she has spoiled me. She calls me at least once a day. When I have surgery, she tries to visit as much as possible. It will only be about 2 days that she will be gone after surgery. She won't be there that day, but I don't think I will know the difference. But she won't be back until Friday night.

Perhaps the good Lord is looking out for the two of us. I understand the first three days post surgery are sheer hell. She will be spared that. I know the helpless feeling when someone you love is in such pain. But I will still miss her being there - terribly.

I am so fortunate to have the family I have - even with their quirks. We love one another a whole lot, and that's so much more than some others have.

Peace.

I'm back

After the shocking letter from the mammography center rocked my world, plus I was trying to get all the emails, etc taken care of, I just didn't post. I was so centered on the fact that something was found that needed additional testing (even though most of these things are not cancer) that I just didn't have it in me to post.

Setting that next appointment was a fiasco in itself! I called the center, as instructed in the letter and by the message on the answering machine, to set that appointment. They said I needed to call Dr. Poison to have orders sent. OK. I know they have to have orders. More of our simple medical insurance system. So I called the good doctor's office. His nurse said she only had a report for a mammogram from January 2009. Nope - this one was December 18, 2009. She did have the bone density report. OK - done at the same time. She tried to access the breast center's computer - it was down. Sounds about right doesn't it! She said for me to call the breast center to have the report faxed to them. I called the breast center - no one answered, so I left a message.

The next day the breast center called. They had the orders. Apparently they had been there the entire time. So I made my appointment. I called the nurse again. You always have to leave a message because they don't break away from clinic. Later she called back, and I told her that all was well after all.

Now I am going to sound like a whiny Texan. The appointment is for tomorrow afternoon. I thought this weather would be getting better. Nope - not above freezing tomorrow. Texans just don't know how to react to this type of weather. I am more worried about the other drivers out there! They don't do well with this stuff. At least it is supposed to be dry, but I'm not holding my breath.

The intervening days have been fun though. I was able to spend time with three of the four grandchildren. On Tuesday, Daughter and I took the girls to see The Princess and the Frog. It was a delightful movie although I was glad that Doodle Bug went to sleep about half way through. The end was rather scary, I thought, for a 2 1/2 year old. I was glad she didn't see it.

Yesterday, DIL invited me to lunch with her and Wiggle Worm. He is getting to be a real little flirt! She is busy planning his first birthday party on February 20. Funny how big these first birthday parties get! Lady Bug had a blowout. Then numbers two and three - nothing big. We'll see about Wiggle Worm's siblings! I am going to embroidery a shirt for the occasion.

DIL's mother was so worried I wouldn't be able to make the party because of my knee surgery. I have a wheel chair! I have had it since I broke my ankle and don't do crutches at all, and walkers are iffy! I will be there !!!

Today I get to get my teeth cleaned. Joy. After that I get to go to the grocery store, and I am dreading that. I am really having mobility problems. Having to go to the store is partially due to my own stupidity. I didn't get fire starters for the fireplace when I went to the hardware store because G didn't get pipe insulation. In weather like this, the fireplace is integral for keeping this part of the house warm. Also, my fat cat is out of food. So I will have to hit the store.

Talking about needing the fireplace. My next door neighbors are replacing their windows. I have to admit - I am jealous. I really think we will have to do that. Even after we replaced the HVAC, we still have some of the same problems. Our living area is either stifling hot in summer and freezing in winter. I really think it is because we are experiencing the tremendous effect of these 35 year old windows. Energy is too expensive these days to waste. I think I will really start hitting G up for new windows.

So there you have it. I'm still scared of the findings of the mammogram. It is like last time, but I also had a reduction of this breast when the other was reconstructed. I am going to hang on to that. I am actually looking forward to the knee replacement because I am just about crippled now. But I will think positively about it all!

Peace.

Back home

We got back this afternoon after having spotty at best connections while gone. I have a lot of stories to tell, but all that iks sidetracked by one piece of mail.

I was going through that mountain when I came across a letter from the Womens' Center where I had my mammogram. It found something that needs additional testing. It went on to say that these things are mostly benign, I need to make an appointment.

This is a repeat of three years ago - almost to the day. So now I am sent spiraling into the depths of fear instead of planning a light hearted "three year survival birthday party."

Merry Christmas

Christmas Day is drawing to a close, and we will be heading off for yet another meal. We began the day at Daughter's house. SIL fixed a really nice breakfast, and then we got to sit to watch the grands while they opened their gifts from Santa. It was really nice.

Doodle Bug is definitely OCD. As she would tear a piece of wrapping paper off, she would look for the appropriate place to put it! Both Lady Bug and Monkey Boy decided DB's toys were the ones with which to play. What a surprise!

Then we went to Son's MIL's house. I just love her mother who is visiting here from Louisiana. She is such a delight. There was enough food there for the masses. It is always so good. The cousins got to exchange gifts there. It was very nice.

In a bit we will be heading back to Daughter's house where there is venison stew awaiting. G just walked in stating he is not a bit hungry. I know what he means. But we did say we would be there.

Tomorrow we are heading to the SSB for New Year's. We will be there until January 4. I will try to stop by from time to time. In the meantime, I hope you had a blessed Christmas, and I hope you hve a very happy and prosperous New Year.

Changes

This morning I was not going to post - anything. I was in a deep funk. The world looked drab, and I couldn't think of anything positive about the day with the exception of the fact that I was breathing and moving about.

Then I met with our Realtor who sold us the other property. We have the house on the market finally. It will be a month after leasing it that we will realize any monies from it because around here the listing fee is a month's rent. Well, that's ok. I want it on the MLS listings.

She was amazed at the change in the property. She made two suggestions, one of which is on the books - a cleaning service to do the windows and so on. That is going to happen. So as soon as we sign the papers and return them, we will have the house on the market.

The real thing that moved me to post was a Christmas card from my "step brother." We are not related in any way by blood. My father married his mother when they were both getting to be elderly. Ron and I seldom had any communication at all. He has five kids, and we really didn't know any of them at all.

When his mother got so sick and I stepped in, that seemed to change things. He inherited a lot more money because of my dad then would have happened before. When Dad died, he inherited even more.

So there has been some communication now. In fact when we went to Disney Land for Lady Bug, we visited him at his newly opened restaurant. We had a lovely time. I got a Christmas card three years ago. He had been treated for colon cancer. Then I got my diagnosis.

We didn't hear again until today. I believe he lost the restaurant because he is selling insurance. But more than anything else, he has had cancer again.

I certainly will be including Ron and his family in my prayers. I think they have had some very hard times. I think the bills were stacking up big time from what his wife said in the letter.

I am not in such a blue mood anymore. I have heard from several people today. So far I have not had a recurrence of cancer. This is another day for me to be grateful, not down.

I hope you have found something of value in this day.

Peace.

Separate ways

Sunday at the kid's Christmas program, I got to thinking. I am a bit sad that my daughter, son and we go to different churches. It's great we all go to church, but it would be nice if it was the same one. I can see problems down the line when Wiggle Worm and his future siblings get old enough to be in programs at their church, and that happening on the same day as his cousins. I have to admit, I did enjoy it when we all went to the same church.

Later that evening, at Daughter's birthday dinner, my DIL was bemoaning the fact that her brother won't be coming here for Christmas at her Dad's house on Christmas Eve. I found that amusing - in a sick, distorted way. You see, Son and DIL will be at her Dad's on Christmas Eve after he gets off work, and then they plan to be at her mother's house on Christmas Day. Now, we are invited to her mother's for both Christmas Eve (I would feel really strange with DIL not there) and Christmas Day. But, do you see any time there for them to spend with just our family? Nope - not just us.

I so wanted to quote that old adage to her:
A daughter is a daughter all her life,
A son is a son until he takes a wife.

That is so very true. It was true of my husband, my SIL, now my son, and now her brother. She was so upset because her SIL's family live in the same city with her brother. I think it may be something that happens because there is so often strife between two women - especially MIL and DIL. I really try to not let that happen. It was a factor in my marriage. If she weren't so thinned skin, I would have said something. There are times it's just better to keep one's mouth shut. And I did. And the twinge of hurt is still there.

Peace.

What a Sunday!!

We began our day in a normal, peaceful way. We went to Daughter's church because the kids were in the Christmas play. I thought I was going to have to hog-tie G. But, he got over it. They did a great job. Not that I am prejudiced or anything.

Later Daughter and I went to see "Precious." We both read Push, the book it is based upon. We knew what we were in for as far as the language and violence. We both thoroughly enjoyed the movie - if that's what how you want to phrase it. The acting was wonderful. The subject matter is another thing, but these things happen to girls.

What really surprised us was this woman came in to the movie with a little girl not more than ten and another little girl about two. The part of the movie where she entered was some of the worst language, and it went on for a long while. I simply could not believe she brought her children to this movie. It is definitely not a children movie. I really don't understand some people these days. I was very uncomfortable for those girls.

The movie was a good time for us - part of Daughter's 36th birthday celebration. Best of all, it cost us nothing because I had passes from my dentist. His hygienist was ill, and they didn't call me before I got there. It wasn't a problem anyway. The dentist is just right here. G had a gift card that we used for two drinks ($9.50 worth). She drives a company vehicle, so we didn't even pay for gas!

All hell broke loose when I got home however. I walked in, talked about the movie a bit, and G asked "Is the generator still running??" I said apparently, but our neighbors have power. This is about 5:15. We were to meet the rest of the family at 6:15 for dinner. He had been sitting for two hours with the generator running. The problem was OURS! We called the utility company. They did come out - about the time we were leaving. The generator company had me leave messages. The utility company said the problem was ours; we had service. Something was not letting the generator switch back to local power.

We went on to dinner with the generator humming away. I really felt bad for the neighbors, but hopefully since it was cold (for us, I know!!!) hopefully they had their windows closed. It ran all night. I will say, it was kind of neat though. We know it will run the house - at least what we were using for the night. And the motor isn't really that loud. Now in the still of a post hurricane night, that may be a different story for the neighbors. We will just have to provide refrigerator space and ice to make up for things!

This morning, the guy whose "emergency number" I called and left a message, said I didn't do those things, but he sent a crew anyway. They got here about 10 this morning. So we used about 20 hours of natural gas to run our lights. The repairman gave me his card with his direct number. I hope we never need it.

All turned out ok, but for a while there, I wasn't sure. The repairman said he would try to get the company to pick up some of the gas bill, but that really isn't that big a thing. I'm sure it will be about $40, but we now know more about that nice little chest that is nestled behind our garage and keeps the home fires burning!

Peace.

Cristmas Traditions

This is a strange topic for today since I am in such a funk about everything in general - even Christmas. But over at RevGalPals, they challenged us to talk about the traditions we have in our families, since all families have different ones. Well, this year I haven't done a single thing - much less follow a tradition.

These are the categories:
1. Traditions you always do: (keeping in mind I haven't done these) We decorate for Christmas the first Sunday in Advent. My daughter's birthday is December 18, and she always loved having the house so festive for her birthday. We would also go back to San Antonio to celebrate with family. She thought (even though she later knew it wasn't true) that her birthday lasted two weeks or more.

2. Things I always cook or like to eat: I would bake dozens of cookies. This year - I don't need them. So there has been zero baking. I like to try to do a fruitcake or two. G likes them. This year - no.

3. Traditions I would like to start: Our family being more proactive in helping others. This includes giving to Lutheran World Relief, the various programs that provide things like cattle, serving at one of the city wide meals. I would like to see us turning Christmas to providing for those who have little.

4. Traditions I would like to discard: Gift giving. Sounds like Scrooge doesn't it? My grandchildren have more things than they could ever use. My children aren't in need. My extended family isn't in need of anything.

5. About our family: As an extended family, we have curtailed the gifts. We just enjoy each other's company at Christmas and New Year's. Our closer family is still giving gifts. We have our private exchanges, and G and I go with Daughter's family. Son's family is having their first Christmas with Wiggle Worm. We'll see what that brings.

We are so fortunate to be where we are in life. We are so fortunate to have our families. I need a better attitude this year!

Peace.

Many steps

Yesterday was the appointment with the bariatric surgeon. He's the one who also did my mastectomy. What a dichotomy. I guess that is a strange combination, but I like him. So . . .

I knew that I had to go on a three month medically supervised weight loss plan to satisfy my insurance, but it was the rest of the hoops I have to jump through that worry me. What this means is I really don't know when I am going to have the surgery. My plans (what a fool to make plans, right?) were to have the left knee done in January and the right knee done in April. Well - with the bariatric surgery having to be done in at least three months, I have a scheduling problem.

The nurse said that when I was over the knee, then we could look at the gastric surgery. She said that I don't want too many surgeries too close together. Hmmmmmm - I am looking at getting three surgeries in about four months. I think that's going to be too many.

Here's what I have to do for the bariatric surgery:

1. Go to my general practitioner. Get him to follow me on a diet for three months, at least.
2. Have additional blood work done and get a cardiac clearance - which I will do the middle of January anyway for the knee.
3. Get a gastric clearance. That means scoping my stomach. And doing an ultrasound of the gall bladder. If there is any problem there, it comes out at the time of surgery. The nurse said since they were already doing that, they would probably do the colonoscopy. I don't really mind the colon stuff - just the prep for it!! I'm not due until July 2011.
4. Meet with a nutritionist. I would think this should be done at the get go, but it can be done at any time before surgery.
5. Meet a psychiatrist. Now that should be interesting.

I figure that if I go through all that, I just might solve my problem eating on my own without losing part of my stomach. As I said, I now have a scheduling nightmare. At first, I was going to make the appointment with the general doc immediately. But I know I cannot drive for three weeks post surgery. So, that would mean that I can't get the first month check in on time.

What I think I am going to do is wait until I am more mobile post the first knee surgery. I will make the appointment with the general doc, and I can go in on a regular basis. So in other words, I think I will have the bariatric surgery after the second knee. I think that will be the best way to go. I think there will be less recovery from the bariatric surgery than from the knee. I just don't want to have the summer the time I am laid up with knee recuperation.

So, there you have it! Isn't this just so exciting!

Peace.

Life

Son's friend's mother died yesterday. I don't know the specifics, but I know the respirator was turned off and death happened at some point. I just hope the passing was peaceful. She has been through so much the last few months.

On another note, I witnessed the passing of a friendship yesterday. I reached out to a friend, and the response was cold. That was the absolute ending this time. Sad.

I still had absolutely nothing in place that would be termed Christmas decorations. Last year, I bought some LED solar light strings on closeout. The weather here has not been conducive to solar anything, so they just sat in the living room. I decided I would throw them onto the bushes outside yesterday afternoon. Two sets did nothing. Two sets lit - for a while. I know they require six hours of light. It is still overcast today. I doubt they will get the light they require.

I did manage to get all sorts of medical appointments set yesterday. I was amazed that I could get the regular gyno set up. I have to wait one year between appointments. That anniversary is January 26 - the day before the great surgery. I was able to set that up! That's good. I wasn't looking forward to "that" appointment after having the knee done!

My appointment with the bariatric surgeon was moved to this afternoon. I'll let you know about that one.

Have a pleasant day.

Peace.

Down

I don't know the exact cause, but I have really been feeling depressed. I sometimes get this way - especially around this time of year. The other day, someone at work mentioned to G what a wonderful season this is. He replied to them that he isn't especially fond of this time of year. He's right.

During this season, as I think I have mentioned before, we have lost my mother, my step mother, my dad, his dad, and a favorite aunt. Just a bit ago, Son called. His friend, who was his Best Man at his wedding, is having to make the decision to remove his mother from life support. This hits me hard. The closeness of out two sons, and she was a breast cancer survivor. The cancer had come back with a vengeance. She was going to San Antonio for experimental treatments that she couldn't get here. That is a bit amazing to me because we do have the premier cancer center here. J's mom had cancer before me. I think she had been a seven or eight year survivor. J is convinced that the cancer was still there, and the medication to stop the production of estrogen (I don't know which one she was taking) just held the cancer at bay.

At any rate, this looks like the end for his mother. I have so much sympathy for J. He, like me, is an only child. I know how hard that is. I don't know if having siblings helps at a time like this, but I do know how horrible this time is for an only child.

I just don't know why I feel so empty inside. I am so lonely. I'll be glad when this season is over. Perhaps this mood will leave with the season.

Peace.

It's a date

The big day id January 27 at 9am. I met with the surgeon today. I didn't realize how severe my knee problem was. The surgeon was amazed at the x-rays. He is concerned about me making it to the 27th. He told me to be very careful where and how I walk.

We will be doing the left first because it's the worst. The bone is breaking apart, and I have little pieces of "stuff" floating around in the knee. It has been there so long that there are secretions around the pieces making them even larger. He likened it to an oyster making pearls. The bone fragments irritate, so there is secretions added to the bone.

I feel somewhat better than I did. He was very reassuring. He actually has a personality! He gave me a cortisone shot to ease the knee somewhat while I wait for the surgery. He actually gave me a script for pain pills. I asked if they were for post surgery, and he said no - that he knew I was in pain now.

So . . . there you have it. My bariatric appointment is for next Thursday. That could probably be squeezed in between the knee surgeries. That is if I go through with the bariatric stuff. We'll see.

Hope you are all in one piece with only natural parts!

Peace.

Busy, busy

I think I am going to have to begin with the "day-timer" again. This is a busy, busy time.

I went to the bone doc today. I have an appointment with the surgeon tomorrow. Wow, that was fast. We will be discussing the dreaded knee replacement. The first doc nearly scared me away from it all. He told me how much it hurts, and many people refuse to have the second one done due to the pain. He said to schedule the second six months after the first, but look forward to a year of hellish pain. Yipee! Sounds just groovy!

When I returned home, there was a call from my OTHER surgeon. My insurance will cover the bariatric surgery. But I have to jump through some hoops to get it. It will be a few months. I have to be on a managed weight loss program. That means them prescribing a diet and watching. Then I will be a candidate. So I see him next Thursday.

In the mean time, I have to have a physical to make sure I am fit for the knee replacement surgery. It's not a little snip-snip like I understand the gastric sleeve is. I am due to see the heart doc soon anyway. So I'll just see about moving that appointment up.

All this and the holidays too. Am I crazy? Well, yes, but that's another story. Am I scared? You bet ya'. But something has to be done. I can't go on this way. I can't walk. I told the nurse at the bariatric doc's office what was going on. Looks like I will have the knee done first. Well, that can't be helped. That is unless the knee surgeon sayd he wants the other first. \

We will see what is what!

Peace.

Too much attention

When I went to the (wrong) Christmas party at the sewing machine place, they introduced a new person who would be doing classes. They also stressed checking the web site for things going on at the sewing machine place. So I did.

I found that this woman was going to be offering a class on a casserole carrier. I have been wanting to do these for a long time. Yesterday I called to get the details. They were scarce. Even the store had no idea. They didn't have her telephone number either.

So, I loaded myself into the car and headed over there this morning. I had no sewing machine - just me. I walked in, and she was in the classroom. Apparently she didn't get word that the other woman had dropped out - so it was just the two of us. She had the fabric - already cut out. So I went off to find a spool of thread.

It was just the two of us! I had full attention. I was using a machine that I didn't know. The first had a bobbin that you put in from the front. I am used to a drop in bobbin. They swapped out the machine.

The worst part, and the part where I had way too much attention, was using the wide bias binding. I don't do well with that stuff. I had to go around this huge circle adding a shoe lace in. The first round, I missed about a half of catching everything. I know she thought I was a real ditz.

We were there for the full three hours. And then some. I do have a casserole carrier, and I can tell you this: when I make them, they will NOT have bias tape holding them together.

Peace.

Offer

Daughter's friend, the one she and Lady Bug accompanied to "A Christmas Carol" yesterday, can bring vendors into her building. I think she only has one or two at a time. She offered space to me.

That sounds really great, but I don't have the items for a "one man show." Most of the items that I made for yesterday's event were specifically for this area. They were in local school colors, and in fact really were monogrammed for that event.

I have ideas for some other things, and I may take NR up on her offer at a later date. It's a shame because this would be a great time to sell. People are thrilled to find easy gifts. I may talk to Daughter more to get her input. Perhaps we do have enough things. But we only have ten wreaths, and other things are vary limited.

Regardless, the pressure is off. I will now set my sights on the July show. Last year, I could have sold hundreds of the neck coolers (they hold water and some say cool you). I heard the organizer say she would find someone for next year. Well, Dora, here I am.

So like other manufacturers, I will shift from Christmas to hot summer stuff. We will see how the break that comes post knee surgery works in. I know I can't bring the craft stuff down - I will have to get myself back up so I can climb stairs. But that has to happen so I can go to the SSB. It is at least six steps to get in there!!

Now I have to set about cleaning this messy house. It is so cluttered. I would like to have help come in every other week. That would be so nice. But I wouldn't allow them in right now!! So it's off to de-cluttering now!

Peace.

Bummer

Here it is 11:54 am. on Sunday December 6. I should be looking for a parking place up at the park so I can be setting up my booth. But here I sit at the breakfast room table.

I really thought the powers that be would cancel this whole shindig. It is in the 40's, overcast and drizzling. We had real snow all over the place day before yesterday. It seems that Holiday in the Park is going on without me. I called to withdraw. I don't think there will be much traffic.

The chairperson said that even if the snow was canceled, they would have the vendors there. I keep telling myself that there won't be much in traffic, but truth be known, I have worked hard to get ready.

I'm not really totally ready. The two week down time with the machine in the shop really put me behind, but I thought I could sell some stuff this time. Now we will never know.

I know it would be miserable out there. The ground is wet, and I think will get wetter because there is going to be more rain before the 4:00 ending time. I don't have warm clothes here. They are all at the SSB.

Still I am bummed. I am really let down. I was all set - now . . . Oh, well. I guess we will have a Christmas in July table at Round-up. Or perhaps we will set up our own craft show (not).

Peace

What's wrong with these pictures?

Other than the fact that it was really overcast, so they are dark, this is the early snow here in Swampland. It got heavier, but Daughter and I went to lunch, so I missed those pictures. The real internet is up today, so I can get these to load. As I have said before, the 3.6 speed just doesn't cut it!!

It is rare for snow to stick to the ground here, but it did. All the shrubs looked like they were sprayed with the canned snow.


We certainly didn't need the umbrella today to block the sun.


Didn't need the fan to blow cooling breezes. In fact, it got to 25 last night. It is 11:23 local time, and there is still snow on the ground in the shade. We are not used to this - at all. I worry about how many plants we have lost. There hadn't even been a light freeze to temper them. We have so many tropicals. We got some into the "green house," our out building, and gave them an electric heater. I am just hoping!!!

Peace.

Well -

I*'m still on air card because I just don't have time to call you-know-who and wait, then set up an appointment for them to come out for a service call.

The surgeon Daughter went to is the one who did my mastectomy. I like him a lot - if you can imagine that after what he had to do! His chief type of surgery now is bariatric surgery. Even though he is not one of my preferred providers, he will do the surgery for what the insurance pays. If it is 80% - he accepts that and doesn't bill for the remainder. I have to admit - I am thinking very seriously about it. I keep weighing the pros and cons. So far, I haven't done it on my own. The knee thing is looming on the horizon (if I would call the bone doc).

I started on the embroidered Christmas cards yesterday. I also got a call from daughter. She has accepted another engagement on Sunday. She, after all these years of doing this, forgot the show was Sunday. I'm a bit bummed. But she said Son in law will help. Hmmmm. Not sure about that.

The tree company is working on the trees at the other house today. I wish G could be there instead of me. They just had a question that I am not sure of. I didn't mark the trees with G, and , um, there is a language problem there too. I don't really know what they are asking.

It hit me this morning that we have to prepare that house for the immanent 26 degrees too. We are not ready here, and I don't know where the vulnerable places in that house are. Gotta call the contractor to see if the plumbers changed out the water cut off for the house. That is the way I WANT to handle it.

Better run - have a good day.

Peace

Short, sweet (?), sorry

Comcast is still MIA so I'm on the air card, and it is limited.

Daughter went to the surgeon. She has mitral valve prolapse, so she should be on antibiotics prior to any procedures, but we forgot about that. He did another ultrasound, found something that was not to his liking, but we have to wait until Thursday for the biopsy. She has to take the antibiotics two hours prior to the procedure.

Thanksgiving went fairly well. After three days, G was tired of Doodlebug. When anything doesn't go her way, she howls. So they left on Saturday to see Son in law's family. It was time.

We did get several hair bows made as well as ten wreaths. If I can get away from this card and its blazing speed of 3.6 Mbps, I will upload some of them. The show is Sunday.

So with all that is going on, I must head upstairs. I have wrist rattles, girl's coins purses and cards to make before Sunday. Feel like a hamster on a wheel!

Peace.