Memories

Memories come flooding back with various and often unusual prompts. I know that I am still in the early stages of grieving Dad’s death. This final fact that now even the body is not here. While watching TV, there was a commercial for better fitting "protective underwear." That made remember that I won’t have to buy that item - at least for a while. I remember D telling me how she was relieved that when her mother died she wouldn’t have to buy the adult diapers anymore. Strange how buying that item can make you feel. In this age the emphasis is youth and the young; you can really find yourself caught up in trying not to grow old. You feel that everyone in the store is looking at your purchase while thinking "that poor old woman - no control over her body functions." One would think I would get over this way of thinking, but, alas, no.

I was also reminded on Sunday that Dad was gone. When we were coming home from church I was reflecting on how I was going to spend the rest of the day when I realized that the Sunday visit with Dad wasn’t going to happen that afternoon. Then G said he also remembered that I wouldn’t be going. K told me Lady Bug asked her if we were going to visit Grandpa. Even the little ones remember.

I know that I will never forget he is gone. That is the way it is supposed to be. I am a Christian, and I believe in the after life, but, at least for right now, he lives in our hearts. That is the way it should be.