My dad died on January 13. It was most certainly expected. I was fully supported by hospice. I was out of town when the end came, but the social worker helped me to see that it would not make a difference if I were there or not. I was not. We went to the hill country place. G wanted to hunt that last weekend and we left in such a rush we needed to check on the place.
As we were driving through San Antonio, I got to remembering Dad's last trip out. G said that would be the last time Dad saw San Antonio, and it was. I was thinking about Dad so as we were going through. At 4:03 pm I got the call from the social worker. I just wish we had made it through town.
But Dad is at peace now. He is no longer trying to figure out where he is and who people are. I miss him terribly.
Today was Lady Bug's birthday party. As we were coming home, I told G I wondered if I would ever get over the bit of anxiety I felt when we had been away. The anxiety that there would be a message that Dad had fallen again, or that he had taken ill. I think that will remain for a long time.
I wish his funeral would have gone the way he had planned it. I'll tell you about that later when we have more time together.
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