Thursday, August 24, 2006

Do you dream?

Some will say that is a silly question. We all go through the deep REM stage where dreams happen, so I suppose my question should really be "do you remember your dreams," or even "are your dreams vivid?"

I’ll bet you can see where this is going! Yep, I’m going to talk about my dreams. I often have really vivid dreams. Many times I am teaching a class - usually chemistry. That’s hard work!
I’m not usually rested after trying to instruct thirteen year olds how chemical compounds are formed. Other times working in dreams is often doing my genealogy and I am diligently trying to track down some ancestor.


Sometime I have really scary dreams that I don’t really remember fully, but I have the sensation that I cannot move. I need to move, react, but I simply can’t. I am panicked. In that dream, I scream, but apparently I really don’t because G doesn’t ask me what the heck is going on!

The dreams that make me sad are the ones about those in my family that have died. My most recent was about my dad. I guess the in laws are weighing so heavily on my mind, their situation combined with thoughts about my dad. I am seeing some of the same signs of dementia in FIL.
I went to San Antonio to stay in the house I grew up in. I do still own it, and it is rented.


Anyway, my renters allowed me to stay there while they were gone. I didn’t say my dreams make sense. My dad was in that house, and I was so wondering how in the world he could function on his own. Then we went to scene two where he was in his own apartment. I still marveled at his seeming ability to manage because he was so demented at the end of his life.
I woke and was terribly sad. I still miss him so much. I would have thought after losing him gradually over the span of about ten years I wouldn’t miss him so deeply. At least I can see him, renewed, in my dreams.

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