Remembering

My father in law died a year ago yesterday. He was such a fine man. He was loving and fair to all the grandchildren. That statement carries an important thought. When my kids were growing up, their grandmother was not fair and loving to all the grandchildren. The girl cousins are three months apart and the boys are two weeks apart, so obviously, they are the same age.

She had her absolute favorite. That was K's cousin E. She looks like their aunt, who is grandma's baby girl. The second in the running was M. My kids were also rans. Holidays were spent in the Capitol City. The trips to Swampland were few and far between.

We all miss father in law greatly.

Mother in law stayed in the Alamo City until just before Thanksgiving. She did move into independent living, but she was alone in Alamo City. That was brought home to her big time when she was whisked to the emergency room. But more than that, she lamented that no one came to see her. Now by "no one" she was referring to us. The same ones that she never bothered to come to see, and were at the end of her favorites list.

She has moved to assisted living in the Capitol City now. We all said that we could visit more if she moved there. Well, it is still difficult. But G and I went by to see her the Monday after Thanksgiving. I didn't think it would have affected me. It did. Greatly.

As we were walking up to the door, there were about 10 rocking chairs clustered around the doorway for the smokers. It was the same where my dad was. My stomach lurched with the memory. I was so glad it was really chilly that day so we didn't have to walk the gauntlet of those old folks sitting, rocking and smoking.

When we went in to sign in, I was struck at just how much these assisted living places are all alike. Sure, this one is two floors with an elevator, but it was just like the one dad was in. When we stepped into the elevator, tears came to my eyes. I missed my dad so much then - as I really do much of the time.

I think from now on, G can go in to visit. I think I need to stay with Simone in the car.

Peace.