Misery

When I was in the surgeon’s office last month for the results of the biopsy he told me there would be good days and bad days in this next year. I thought it would be when the chemo kicked in. I don’t know what the future holds as far as the results of the chemo, but these cold days here in Swampland has my arthritis screaming.

I have been off the drug that keeps the arthritis at bay for about two weeks at this point. It is obviously completely out of my system. The substitute he wants me to take just doesn’t cut it. I am really hurting, and my sleep was severely affected last night.

It bothers me that I can be sent into such despair over this little set back. I have tried to be so strong about this cancer, and if I can be reduced to a sniveling blob because of this discomfort, what is in my future?

Will I be able to regain my composure when the going gets really tough?

The one thing that is a little light at the end of the tunnel is that for a period of time, there will be no surgeries scheduled. That means I can take my magic elixer, and all will be right in the world again - mostly.